The Storyline Service. Worldbuilding, Plots, Characters & Internal Consistency!

[Diokatsu]

Well, if UltaFlame isn't going to be around, then I'll try my hand at the job. I'm a former member of the Service, after all. And that was when I was thirteen. Imagine how much better my ideas will be now!

So, hit me with your best shot.


*Takes over the thread in a revolution*

Woah. I claim this thread >8U No noob is gonna walk all up on my turf and tell me what to do! Seeing as I am Ulta's incarnated, socially adept form, I win >8U.

[Arkaea Halfdemon]

*Pulls out a cheaply crafted imitation Masamune*

[Blizzard]

Please stop spamming this thread.

[Subsonic_Noise]

Well I need help on the story of my game Dystopia. The problem is: the main story needs to stay secret.
So, anybody's got MSN?

[legacyblade]

I have MSN, but I'd prefer doing this via PM. send me a PM if you want my help.

[Subsonic_Noise]

I have MSN, but I'd prefer doing this via PM. send me a PM if you want my help.

I spammed your PM Inbox. So, could you help?

[legacyblade]

received PMs, will help soon.

[C.C. rOyAl]

hey ive got a really good project goin but... i dont have a middle!! 
all i can think of is a beginning and end. can anyone help me?
im tryin to have a game with 25+ hours. yess im aware its gonna take a lot of work but im up for it.
i would rather you pm me for secrecy. thanks

[Starrodkirby86]

General help, just passing through, don't mind me~

If you have a beginning and end, then all you need to do is think of enough interesting twists and such to engross the player. It's best to make mistakes around here (If you are), especially the build-up to the climax, since if the player is already going through this much, they must have /some/ interest (except reviewers).

Think of plot twists and aim for character development. Make your middle build up to the story's climax.

[C.C. rOyAl]

ya im always on this forum, it fricken owns rmxp.org and rpgrevolution. You gets such a quick response and everyone pretty much knows everyone if their active a decent amount of time. but i hav a friend helpin with storyline now. im just no good of plot twists

[Valcos]

If you want, you could send me the part of the story you have now. I'll read it over and we could bounce some ideas off each other or something (sounds kind of weird xD)

[BlackStatic]

Uhhh, is this thread 'hiring' still? I'm a rather good writer, who mostly deals with darker stories. End of the world, Zombie apocalypses, Demons, Ghosts, Hauntings. I'm also pretty good at creating histories for the stories, and character development. I can think up multiple stories taking place in the same world, branching stories(for more 'open ended' games), and like to add in humor to offset the dark atmosphere. hopefully this thread is still hiring, because i'd hate to be wasting my words right now. lol

[Subsonic_Noise]

Uhhh, is this thread 'hiring' still? I'm a rather good writer, who mostly deals with darker stories. End of the world, Zombie apocalypses, Demons, Ghosts, Hauntings. I'm also pretty good at creating histories for the stories, and character development. I can think up multiple stories taking place in the same world, branching stories(for more 'open ended' games), and like to add in humor to offset the dark atmosphere. hopefully this thread is still hiring, because i'd hate to be wasting my words right now. lol

Let's see... Ulta is banned, Diokatsu is gone, I haven't seen Arkaea for a while... It's your thread XDDD
:V :V :V :V :V :V :V :V :V :V :V :V

[BlackStatic]

Uhhh, is this thread 'hiring' still? I'm a rather good writer, who mostly deals with darker stories. End of the world, Zombie apocalypses, Demons, Ghosts, Hauntings. I'm also pretty good at creating histories for the stories, and character development. I can think up multiple stories taking place in the same world, branching stories(for more 'open ended' games), and like to add in humor to offset the dark atmosphere. hopefully this thread is still hiring, because i'd hate to be wasting my words right now. lol

Let's see... Ulta is banned, Diokatsu is gone, I haven't seen Arkaea for a while... It's your thread XDDD
:V :V :V :V :V :V :V :V :V :V :V :V

Gasp! REALLY??? lol, well, I guess just PM me or something if you need ideas or something.

[Subsonic_Noise]

Uhhh, is this thread 'hiring' still? I'm a rather good writer, who mostly deals with darker stories. End of the world, Zombie apocalypses, Demons, Ghosts, Hauntings. I'm also pretty good at creating histories for the stories, and character development. I can think up multiple stories taking place in the same world, branching stories(for more 'open ended' games), and like to add in humor to offset the dark atmosphere. hopefully this thread is still hiring, because i'd hate to be wasting my words right now. lol

Let's see... Ulta is banned, Diokatsu is gone, I haven't seen Arkaea for a while... It's your thread XDDD
:V :V :V :V :V :V :V :V :V :V :V :V

Gasp! REALLY??? lol, well, I guess just PM me or something if you need ideas or something.

I don't know about legacyblade and Valcos though... But finders keepers. XDD

[BlackStatic]

Sooo, should I start my own thread? or add to this?

[Subsonic_Noise]

Just add to this. If somebody comes by and says that this is his thread, you can still kill him.

[winkio]

1.  Yes, this is the appropriate place if you want to help with stories.  I think legacyblade might be in charge here maybe.
2.  You can also feel free to start your own thread if you want to be separate.
3.  Off topic == FTL.  Even in a dead thread.  It's not in SPAM yet, which means stay on topic and keep it serious.

[Xuroth]

Ok, dont kill me if this thread is too dead to post in, but I really dont care. I have been working on a storyline for the past couple weeks, but I think I just have a way too high opinion of it due to the fact I wrote it (runon anyone?). My request is this:
1. I want a review of the story as it stands
2. I want feedback about the story (positive and negative)
3. I want suggestions (not just random filler) to lengthen the story to make a longer game

You up to it? Of course you are...

Spoiler: ShowHide

[spoiler]A child is born, and her mother is unable to care for her. The mother, scared and on the run from something she refuses to say, stays one day after birthing her daughter and leaves. Several years later, the young girl has grown to be an outcast in her own home. While loved deeply by those she names her parents, most people feel uncomfortable around, though nothing seems to cause this feeling but her mere presence. Alyra, the girl, becomes ill. One day, she is angry at some children (younger than she anyway) and wishes they would learn to just behave. In her immense anger, she unknowingly summons a wolf demon. The demon brutally slaughters the children, but is fought off by the villagers. None blame ALyra, for they do not realize it was her fault. She however feels such depression and despair for the loss of the children she goes out into the surrounding forest to kill herself (her thoughts lead up to it, her original intention was just to get away from everyone) She is attacked by the demon and a boy from a neighboring village is chasing it. He teams up with Alyra and through an unveiling of her powers, she is able to commune with it as it is sent back to the Pit. Aeravyn, the boy, does not understand, and delivers the final blow just after the demon mentions Alyra's mother's name. The girl is now convinced that her mother is imprisoned in the Pit, travels (with the boy protecting her ) to A'noch, the City of Knowledge and Wisdom (basically a scholars paradise.)

Spoiler: ShowHide

While in A'Noch, the companions travel to the Great Library. Alyra focuses on maps and strategy, while Aeravyn goes to gather supplies. He is starting to feel this awkward feeling from her, but only when shes around. Convinced this girl is special (not in the short bus way, no offense) he meets up with some friends in town. They ridicule him and criticize him 1) for falling for a girl 2) for challenging demons...on purpose... He is able to convince a couple of friends to meet with him at the library.  Meanwhile, Alyra is confronted by a middle-aged man who is very surprised by the material Alyra is reading. Offering to help her get more knowledge he invites her and her partner to his small house. Alyra, Aeravyn, and the 2 friends meet at this strangers house, ready for trouble. (Alyra is kindof reckless but she usually has the support she needs around her) The man tells them the best way to learn is to go there. Seeing their faces, he says the second best way to learn is to talk to someone who lives there. He sets up wards and summons an imp. Alyra and the imp converse, then the imp tricks her into trying to enter the pit. Aeravyn and his friends enter after her and are just in time to help her fight off the imp.

Spoiler: ShowHide

 While questing, they release a demon from its prison unknowingly (not mentioned later, possibly a sequel) The group finds a portal to leave, but Alyra refuses to go until she finds her mother. She is confronted by a large demon lord, Agyrus (funny how all the names start with "A"), who is in combat with the girls mother. The mother, momentarily surprised by her child's appearance in such a place is distracted long enough for Agyrus to strike her down. He then consumes part of her soul and becomes fully restored (and more powerful) The child, enraged, fights agyrus and reveals her demonic heritage (surprise!) She is able to weaken the demon, but he flees, Alyra takes her mother's body and escapes the Pit through the portal found earlier. The portal takes her to a futuristic dimension where she is able to have her mother cremated. The mother's ashes are compressed into a diamond and given back to the child. The child takes the diamond and it is absorbed by her (unwillingly), making her more powerful. She ................. and eventually find agyrus. They fight again, and the child destroys him and consumes his essence. (yay! and why does everything deal with essence? part of sequel maybe)

If you think you can assist me with this semi-cliche storyline, your input would be appreciated. Thanks for taking the time to read this...

[scoace13]

... ok this story jumps around a lot...a lot. to help you with this i need to find some things out (u can pm them to me). A) What is the Pit? Where did it come from? Who or what made the demons in the pit? B) summoning? How is it possible? Can only certain people do it or just any one is they try hard enough? C)who are:" the girl", "the boy", "the girls mother", "agyrus" ,ect. ? Why are they doing what their doing( stuff like why the girl wants to seek out her mother, and things of that nature that you dont mention) D) What time is this in? What happening in the world? Where and what is the world that they live in( aka are they on earth or some planet in a galaxy far far away)?