My friend just left after acting like the biggest god damn cunt ever.
So, let's start from the beginning:
Me and him are both prepping to do a let's play of Donkey Kong Country: Tropical Freeze (I wasn't forcing him to do it, it's something we both wanted to do), and I set up the mic to extend out between us, yeah? Well, I needed to make test audio recordings, to see if it picked our voices up okay, and he kept fucking around with me while I was trying to do it.
I was trying to make one recording, and he kept forcing me to stop doing it and just get to the actual thing.
At this point, I'm getting irritated. Now, for the last couple of tests, I say something, then ask him to, and he keeps being silent with a big fucking grin on his face as I'm progressively getting angrier, and angrier. I keep asking him to say something, then he finally says laughing (I'm kind of paraphrasing here), "Why do you gotta get so fucking mad? Quit taking it so seriously."
Well, ex-fucking-scuse me!
You wanted to do this with me! I'm not going to record 50+ minutes of fucking footage only to discover our goddamn voices were too faint or messed up by background noise to be fixed post production! I want to get it right before we take the time to record. That is perfectly fucking understandable. But no, him fucking with me over it is just fine, and me reacting like a goddamn human to his excessive bullshit is apparently uncalled for. I'm the one in the wrong! Anyways, we finally got around to it shortly after, and it was fun.
(don't think I'm putting these up now, though. ultimately a waste of time, considering the following events)
Anyways, fast-forward to shortly before he leaves...
I pick up his 3DS XL to play with (which he is a-okay with me doing, so no worries just yet).
I decided to enter his Pokémon Bank application to see what kind of cool Pokémon he has (last we battled, he had a nice party with some cool legendaries), basically so I can say "Niiiice, I'm jealous, man."
Well, his 3DS was not connected to my WiFi (he always connects his phone and every damn console he brings over to my house to the WiFi, so actually fucking connecting to it is no fucking issue at all with him), so I went into his settings to connect it, but it was password protected. I kindly asked if he could enter the pin so I can put in the WiFi password, then he starts getting fucking suspicious towards me!
"What do you want to do?"
"I just want to look at what you have in your Pokémon Bank."
"Why?"
"I just want to see what kind of Pokémon you have in there."
Then he proceeds to not say yes or fucking no, leaving me with no satisfactory answer, UNTIL:
I go into his parental controls to JOKE ABOUT RESETTING HIS PASSWORD.
The secret question was, "What was the name of your first pet?"
I was joking about reading the question, then I said the name of his first pet and how I'd put it in, and he flipped the fuck out.
He immediately told me to "stop looking through his shit" (oh, yeah, because the BARREN-AS-FUCK SETTINGS MENU OF THE 3DS HAS ANY OF "YOUR" SHIT IN IT, LOL TOTALLY), and then proceeded to open up YouTube and try to read everything in my inbox. He thought that since I was "invading his privacy", he had every god damn right to go and do it to me!
YEAH, OKAY. How does reading my VERY PRIVATE messages in my YouTube inbox compare to me JOKING ABOUT ENTERING THE NAME OF HIS PET WHICH I KNEW ABOUT FOR YEARS AND HE FUCKING KNEW I KNEW ABOUT, EVEN REMOTELY THE SAME FUCKING THING? HOW!? SOMEONE FUCKING TELL ME, PLEASE!?
He also bitched about how I went through his PS3 inbox before right in front of him. Did I? Hell fucking no! I joked, AGAIN.
I pressed on the Inbox icon, which takes you to the options to select sent or received messages on the PS3. That is all. I didn't select anything at all after that. I backed out of the menu.
But of course, in his warped fucking mind, I did go beyond that, and now he uses that as an example of me invading his privacy every single time I fuck around with him about this kind of stuff. Wow!
Anyways, back to the 3DS thing: he was whining and bitching about me entering his pet's name to change the password, when I never even fucking did it.
So, yeah, it went from me not doing it to actually doing it, somehow. Weird. Anyways... he kept saying how he "doesn't like people trying to enter his information on anything to see his stuff", when in reality I never tapped one fucking button on the keypad for the password, or the keyboard for the pet's name. Didn't. Press. One. Button. So, really, I didn't even try. I was just fucking around like it'd be some friendly thing, and had no idea it'd blow up like it did.
You know what makes this so fucking pathetic?
He doesn't like people actually trying to force their way into his shit. Understandable! Neither do I. But, oh, wait...
He always does it to me. ALWAYS. He actually goes out of his way to try and unlock my phone to get into it (one time even fucking locking me out of it because the dipshit kept putting in the wrong pin), and when I leave it unlocked and on? He picks it right up, goes in my web browser to see my history, into my photos app to see pictures I've saved and taken, and tries to look at my goddamn text messages.
He also does this shit with my fucking computer.
He's also ACTUALLY done it with MY damn PS3 messages.
But do I get all pissy about it and throw an immature bitchfit? No. I just get irritated and tell him to stop.
And at that point, he does the same fucking thing he did to me during the test recordings for Donkey Kong: "Why are you getting so fucking mad?"
Why am I getting so fucking mad? Because you're acting like an insufferable, hypocritical cunt!
Best of all: he can literally never see when he does wrong, at all. Ever.
He can also never be wrong. He always has to be right, everyone else fucking wrong.
(like this one time years ago when we had an argument over the appearance of animated red blood in Ocarina of Time: I said it only appeared in the Gandondorf/Ganon battle in the first version of the game, but he argued it did appear in all of them, which is SIMPLY NOT FUCKING TRUE. How does he look back at the argument!? With it being COMPLETELY FLIPPED! He apparently said it appeared in the first version only, I apparently said it appeared in all... WOW! And if I try to tell him that's not how it happened? "Uh, no, idiot, that's not how it happened." YEAH, NEVER MIND THE FACT I HAVE TIME AND FUCKING TIME AGAIN PROVEN TO HAVE A MUCH BETTER AND CLEARER MEMORY THAN YOU!)
Anyways, after all of that, how does he spend the rest of his time at MY HOUSE, after I've MADE HIM DINNER, and ORDERED me and HIM pizza earlier in the day?
Even fucking helping him and getting him every damn thing he asked for (getting him a glass of water time and time again, hooking up his Wii U for him, getting him snacks or whatever the fuck)?
Oh, well, he ignores every single word I say to him, of course!
I try to talk to him, start up conversation, ask what he wants to do, ask if he needs anything, ask him if he's alright.
It doesn't matter, he rudely fucking ignores me in my own god fucking damn house! After he stirred up a shitstorm with me like the fucking hypocrite he is!
And before he leaves, I ask, "Why are you ignoring me?" and he fucking says to me, "Why do you always have to talk?"
"Okay, you're clearly doing this because you think I went through your stuff."
"No, that's not it, Branden."
"Yeah, okay. You did the exact same thing at your house when you thought I was purposely trying to kill your character and make him lose money in GTA V."
"Uh, yeah, you fucking did do that on purpose."
"No, I didn't. The police were running after me, and I couldn't escape them."
(yeah, so, why the fuck did he even let me play on his god damn GTA V file, then? I don't understand, I mean, to walk around the fucking city and NOT shoot someone!? hell fucking no! and I DID try to get away from the cops, but they still killed me. Whoopdy-fucking-doo, anyways! Money is INSANELY easy to get in MASS QUANTITIES in GTA V! you whined and moaned like a little bitch, ignored me, and removed me from facebook over something as small as losing a couple hundred dollars on your fucking new file)
So, he finally leaves with a smart-ass "see you later".
Wow, you childish, immature fuck. Thanks! See you later, too!
Well, I'm debating whether or not I actually will.
I'm also going to be ignoring any texts or fucking phone calls he may make to me for a good while too, see how that fucking prick likes it.
Anyways, this isn't the first time he's gone full retard. There's something else he started at the anime convention we went to, as well, that I still really need to fucking vent about.
I'll type it up later.