I feel like I've been throwing myself at a wall.

Started by Ryex, July 31, 2014, 09:20:29 pm

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Ryex

as some of you in the chat may know I found out that I've been placed on Academic Suspension for this fall semester for having to low of a GPA. I feel like I'm throwing myself at a wall that I have all the tools but no will to climb. and I've been doing it for years expecting a different result, is that not the definition of insanity? I'm in the uncomfortable position of knowing I CAN, but have "proven" to myself time and again I can't. the dichotomy wears at me.

My parents are insisting I find a tutor and I don't have the heart to tell them I just need to try harder. in fact if I did tell them that I don't think they would believe me as I've had them convinced that I've been trying my hardest. to suddenly ear me say that I haven't.. I'm almost sure they would deny it with all they have.
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Zexion

Omg, ryex how even in the hell?
There has to be something your doing that distracts you from school. Whatever it is, you need to stop doing it or do it a lot less and focus on teh studies. You're to smart to be on probation 'specially if you're genuinely not struggling with anything. Don't give up though, you can still bounce back from this

Ryex

That... actually hits far to close to home for my own comfort. My dad, on numerous occasions, has made the same accusation. He personally points to my computer and says it is to blame and to quote him exactly I "should consider turning it off permanently."

He's not wrong in the strictest sense. my priorities were warped in the beginning, I was trying to treat school as something I was doing "in the meantime" while my real goals were side projects like ARC ect. but I realized the folly of that about a year and a half ago and have been refocusing sense. But he is right, that the computer and the distractions it offers are to blame this his solutions is not only the worst option, but it would destroy me. My real identity has never really left the halls of the internet where it grew up. to abandon it and the only thing I can control..
I no longer keep up with posts in the forum very well. If you have a question or comment, about my work, or in general I welcome PM's. if you make a post in one of my threads and I don't reply with in a day or two feel free to PM me and point it out to me.<br /><br />DropBox, the best free file syncing service there is.<br />

Zexion

You don't need to give it up. Just try to be less attached to it. Or set limits like, you can't log on until all of your stuff is done for the day. You need to do something though, you don't want to toss away the work that you haave done :bI'm actually in the exact same position for the exact same reason right now ._.

winkio

One thing you could try as Zexion said is imposing some limits on yourself, such as for every 1 hour you spend on the internet or coding a personal project, you have to spend a half an hour away doing something else.  Of course it may not be the best approach, since the limits are artificial and require a lot of discipline to enforce.

However, I think it's a better idea to find a way to move forward instead of trying to go backward with limits.  The best way to change your habits is to do different and new things.  Find new sites to frequent, hang out on Skype more, start writing a book, learn to cook new meals, etc.  The more you change your habits by doing things you want to do, the easier it will be to change your habits by doing things you don't want to do.  Instead of trying to remove a part of who you are, try to grow and be more diverse, skilled, or experienced.

Blizzard

August 01, 2014, 03:29:36 am #5 Last Edit: August 01, 2014, 03:32:41 am by Blizzard
Quote from: Ryex on July 31, 2014, 11:13:25 pm
my priorities were warped in the beginning, I was trying to treat school as something I was doing "in the meantime" while my real goals were side projects like ARC ect.


I think that's your answer.

There are a couple of things you can do. Some of them are just to increase efficiency in studying, because there is a chance that you're just approaching the whole thing the wrong way.

1. Make a quantitative analysis about how much you study. In other words, ask around how much people study for certain classes and see if your time spent studying matches up or it below some average that you could find out.

2. Find a tutor. Really, it's not the worst thing in the world to ask for help. You don't have to find one for every class. Just try to find one for the classes you are seemingly struggling with.

3. winkio has a very good point. But for the beginning you should definitely try some discipline. You could make a half-flexible schedule if you have enough willpower to pull through. e.g. Say that you are going to study for 6 hours next week, but you can distribute it however you like. You can do it all at once or do one 1 per day or whatever combination you like. Ranges are also good. Say that you are going to do a minimum of 4 hours, but a maximum or 8 next week.
Flexibility is very important when you are trying to learn a new habit. If you go too hard on yourself, you might get fed up and quit after a short while (most people give up after about 2 months which is also about the time it takes to acquire a new habit). So take it easy with the new habit of studying.

4. Take notes on actual paper while studying. The point isn't even the notes, but there's just something that improves learning if you write down new knowledge. It might take a bit longer, but you also remember more afterwards.

5. Study with others. When you study with others, you will exchange information that each of you learned and learn faster together. By repeating and explaining that information to others, you will also solidify it in your own mind.

6. Try self-tests. This is a pretty good concept if you can't find others. After you go once through the materials, go through a second time and simultaneously try to put together a set of questions (preferably write them actually down on a piece of paper). The day after studying try to solve your own questions (again, write things down on a piece of paper.) Why a day later you ask? Knowledge is processed and permanently stored during sleep. I have had exams where I studied the same day and I couldn't remember shit only to have that exact knowledge pop into my head the day after! So always get a good amount of sleep before solving your own tests and before actual exams as well.

There is one last very important thing that you have to do: Think of yourself as a total newb and retard. Don't ever say "No, I don't have to study for this class" or "No, I'm above that shit". Instead just take things at face value and take them on like that. If there's something simple to do, do it. You have to consider the fact that you are possibly on a low level of knowledge (much lower than you think) and that your studying habits are crap. By doing even the most trivial of tasks and assignments (along with the other stuff obviously), you will condition yourself to be more thorough and this will help you with everything else.

Look at it this way: If you are playing an RPG now, maybe those little things will give you only low amounts of XP. But the mere fact that you spend time on doing it anyway will increase your overall skill outside of the game. You have more time to experiment on simpler things and even optimize them. Maybe the extra XP won't help much when you get to a boss fight, but the mere fact that you maybe fought an annoying enemy a couple of times has taught you at which point in time it's best to heal and when you have to stop attacking and focus on healing and buffing until you are strong enough again to resume attacking. Have you ever watched a speedrunner play a game? Watch a Super Mario 64 speedrun or a Megaman X, X2 or X3 one. It's insane how people optimized certain segments on the game. They probably spent countless hours on perfecting them, learning even the smallest details.
A good mentality here is that you don't try to go for a pass, go for the best possible grade instead. When your own bar is higher, you will perform better.
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Praelium

I rarely post. But I just have to say something here. I want to get it off my chest, because it seems like I am not the only one feeling like this right now.

I am working on 2 projects right now that mean a lot to me as a person. I am working on a game in Unity and have my harsh noise project. I study Mixed Media, an art education that allows me to use any media I want, and leaves decision making and creativity to me. What I did was to integrate the 2 projects I am working on in this education. Basically, my artistic work right now is my noise project. Other than that I am thinking to work on my game next year, as part of my studio.

What I immediately realized this year, is that the importance of most theory classes and things that don't apply to my project just seemed to be useless. They were of no use to me, "so whatever". What I am struggling with right now is to succeed these classes. I have to re-do 5 of them, 2 of them being essays, 2 of them being study material. The last one seemed to plain bore me, so I am letting go of that one.

The struggle I have is that somewhere, something went wrong with my interest in these classes. Was it just me that started to set personal goals and interests? Or was I just unable to handle the freedom of not having to go to all the classes? I feel a great motivation to work on my projects and be involved in the world surrounding my projects, while the world around the other classes don't seem to appeal to me at all. I feel like the only thing that interests me are things that are useful for my projects or future projects. Integrating the projects in my education was something that helped a lot in this situation, but it did not seem to give me interest in the other classes.

I have never studied in my life, I never needed to. Now I am in a situation where I need to try really hard to study things I don't give a square shit about.