Looks good, just two things I'd like to note:
1) Fix little grammar things, like always separate appositives and prepositional phrases at the beginning of sentences with a comma (eg "If I ____, I would ____")
2) I hate the music you chose. While I can respect your decision, it'd be nice if you picked more "neutral" music - something that most people are okay with hearing while they play, etc, even if they don't *like* it.