Chain Mails - the ultimate response!

Started by Blizzard, July 25, 2010, 03:29:58 pm

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Blizzard

Thank you everybody who has been sending me spam-mails! I thank you for your kindness because:

1. I have gathered around 3000 years of bad luck and died already 67 due to various mails I haven't forwarded.

2. When I go to the shop and leave afterwards, I never make eye contact because I am afraid that some stranger might take me to an unknown motel, drug me and surgically remove my kidney so he can sell it on the black market.

3. The orphan girl Amy Bruce from Cambodia has gotten a yearly payment from me which she was paid by Microsoft for every sent mail. Though, she has been in a hospital around 7000 in the last couple of years and since 1995 she's been 8 years old.

4. My name roams around the universe on a platinum plate because I had to write it down along with the other 2 billion people at least 25 times so far.

5. I've learned the recipe for love and happiness: It suffices to forward e-mails to all possible addresses within 3 seconds upon receive, then scratch my back with my left hand, jumping around like a chicken around a Skoda Octavia counterclockwise.

6. I'm still waiting for some rich guy from Boukistan to transfer me a billion Boukistan gold coins and a Nokia which I have earned by sending a mail to Ericsson.

7. I have saved at least 2 extremely endangered species of white, short-tailed White-Russian squirrels.

8. I have read 25 tons of the collected pieces of the Dalai Lhama and have gathered 4690 years of peace and wealth.

Once again: THANK YOU, EVERYBODY!

Important:
If you don't forward this e-mail within 20 seconds to at least 850 other receivers, the space dinosaur will come and eat you and your family together with little Amy Bruce who's in hospital. AGAIN.
Check out Daygames and our games:

King of Booze 2      King of Booze: Never Ever
Drinking Game for Android      Never have I ever for Android
Drinking Game for iOS      Never have I ever for iOS


Quote from: winkioI do not speak to bricks, either as individuals or in wall form.

Quote from: Barney StinsonWhen I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead. True story.

element


Blizzard

Sure. I use it each time I get a stupid mail, lol!
Check out Daygames and our games:

King of Booze 2      King of Booze: Never Ever
Drinking Game for Android      Never have I ever for Android
Drinking Game for iOS      Never have I ever for iOS


Quote from: winkioI do not speak to bricks, either as individuals or in wall form.

Quote from: Barney StinsonWhen I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead. True story.

element


WhiteRose

July 25, 2010, 07:30:12 pm #4 Last Edit: July 25, 2010, 07:33:44 pm by WhiteRose
I saw the name of this topic and thought instantly of this:
Spoiler: ShowHide


On topic: I lol'd. I read another really funny response similar to this the other day; I'll see if I can dig it up.


EDIT:
Ah, here it is:
http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/text/chain

fugibo

Quote from: WhiteRose on July 25, 2010, 07:30:12 pm
I saw the name of this topic and thought instantly of this:
Spoiler: ShowHide


On topic: I lol'd. I read another really funny response similar to this the other day; I'll see if I can dig it up.


EDIT:
Ah, here it is:
http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/text/chain


obv. this response is inferior 2 bullet

cyclope

Things I Hate

1. People who point at their wrist asking for the time... I know where my watch is pal, where the hell is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is?

2. People who are willing to get off their a** to search the entire room for the TV remote because they refuse to walk to the TV and change the channel manually.

3. When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too". Damn Right! What good is cake if you can't eat it?

4. When people say "it's always the last place you look". Of course it is. Why the hell would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they?

5. When people say while watching a film, "did ya see that?" No Loser, I paid $12 to come to the cinema and stare at the damn floor!

6. People who ask "Can I ask you a question?"... Didn't give me a choice there, did ya sunshine?

Blizzard

No, a friend of mine once got that e-mailed back.
Check out Daygames and our games:

King of Booze 2      King of Booze: Never Ever
Drinking Game for Android      Never have I ever for Android
Drinking Game for iOS      Never have I ever for iOS


Quote from: winkioI do not speak to bricks, either as individuals or in wall form.

Quote from: Barney StinsonWhen I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead. True story.

Kett Shee

The only chain mails I get tell me to call everyone and scream Chocolate then immediately hang up if you love them and things like that.

God, I have weird friends.  :^_^':
You're all daft cunts. I love you. <3