CP - The Soap Opera

Started by Blizzard, August 17, 2010, 03:28:33 pm

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Blizzard

August 17, 2010, 03:28:33 pm Last Edit: August 17, 2010, 03:53:14 pm by Blizzard
Who has seen the recent shouts will realize where this is coming from. :P

There are not much of rules here. You are allowed to develop your own character and keep your story going on. There is no need for sign-ups, this is the thread where it all happens. Get into dialogs with people and uncover the dark secrets of CP. :O Just keep it "civilized".

So, I just found out that Sub is my son. WhiteRose isn't his mom, though. But me and Sub had sex. And I just broke up with him. Since he's minor, I might end up in jail if our past relationship becomes public.

Go on from here. As I said, develop your own story. Just, please, for the sake of pedobear, don't be stupid.
I will patch up loose story threads if people don't post. You can do it yourself as well. If you're with somebody in the middle of a conversation and that person doesn't post for a week or something like that, just stop the conversation and go do something else. Again, please, for the sake of pedobear, don't be stupid.
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Quote from: winkioI do not speak to bricks, either as individuals or in wall form.

Quote from: Barney StinsonWhen I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead. True story.

element

So, I just found out that Sub is my son. WhiteRose isn't his mom, though. But me and Sub had sex. And I just broke up with him. Since he's minor, I might end up in jail if our past relationship becomes public.

Oww man...  Just woke up next to a girl wich name I don't remember. There was noise again... My neighbors sure know how to shout. That happens more lately. I that that Blizzard guy always is involved in the argument but always with an other person. Two days ago he was in a fight with his woman I guess and now it seems like he's talking to a guy. Strange things are happening in that house lately. If i'll wake up again by noises tomorrow I'll go and talk with that Blizzard guy. But first I'll have to think af a way to get rid of that girl in my bed...


Something like that? My personnage will come more in conversation with others later in the story  :)

Blizzard

Sure, that's fine.

Also, let me change a detail in my piece of story. Otherwise it just wouldn't feel right. >.<

So, I just found out that Sub is my daughter. WhiteRose isn't her mom, though. But me and Sub had sex. And I just broke up with her. Since she's minor, I might end up in jail if our past relationship becomes public.

And you don't have to repost what the people before you said.
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Quote from: winkioI do not speak to bricks, either as individuals or in wall form.

Quote from: Barney StinsonWhen I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead. True story.

element

Ah ok now I need to modify something in my part too

Oww man...  Just woke up next to a girl wich name I don't remember. There was noise again... My neighbors sure know how to shout. That happens more lately. I that that Blizzard guy always is involved in the argument but always with an other person. Two days ago he was in a fight with his woman I guess and now it seems like he's talking to a young girl. Strange things are happening in that house lately. If i'll wake up again by noises tomorrow I'll go and talk with that Blizzard guy. But first I'll have to think af a way to get rid of that girl in my bed...


Blizzard

Yeah. xD No more mods then. It would just get too confusing.

God, I hope nobody finds out about this. I wonder if anybody noticed when we had a fight that it wasn't WhiteRose I was fighting with? Meh, nobody would probably notice that she was much younger. Man, if she finds out, she'll probably want to get divorced. Hm... What if somebody did hear? What am I gonna do?! D:
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Quote from: winkioI do not speak to bricks, either as individuals or in wall form.

Quote from: Barney StinsonWhen I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead. True story.

Delusian

I'm the 21 year old hansom local club owner everyone loves ;)
My clubs been around for 5 years, some might call it a dodgy scene but I declare thats only because that's where Blizz hooked up with Sub. He just thought she was a beautiful striper. What can I say. I don't control my staff?

Blizzard

LMAO, I love where this is going. Man, I'm gonna be such a corrupted bastard. D:

This is serious. I could lose my business and everything I have! I have to find out if somebody knows what's going on. I need a private detective... He should spy on my neighbors...
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Quote from: winkioI do not speak to bricks, either as individuals or in wall form.

Quote from: Barney StinsonWhen I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead. True story.

element

Pfff... Now I'm awake anyway I'd better go to the club and have some fun :naughty:. I'll get rid of the girl later.   ..."at the club"...   Ah my favorite club. Delusians' place always was my place... I have a lot of memories here... Tons of girls I met, millions of times I got wasted here... Good Times... Now that I think of it... Didn't I saw that Blizzard guy here last week whit a other girl? What would his wife think of that? Ah... His wife...   Beautiful Rose, I never got the chance to get her. Had Tons of wimen but never had her...
Maybe some day... Let the fate deside about that  ;).



Also, maybe we can respect days properly and have one Day==one Soap Day

Blizzard

That's not a bad idea actually. We'll see how it works out.
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Quote from: winkioI do not speak to bricks, either as individuals or in wall form.

Quote from: Barney StinsonWhen I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead. True story.

element

August 17, 2010, 04:39:39 pm #9 Last Edit: August 18, 2010, 03:04:34 am by element
Well be back after the commercials People...

CP's Opera Soap...
Powered By Chaos Soap...

Subsonic_Noise

Meanwhile, at his house, Sub took off his wig and fake breasts.
His plan has worked, and he would finally be able to start Project Chaos. Turning around, carefully eyeing the recordings of the security cams he set up in Blizzards house, 15 of them in his bathroom, he laughed manically and took a bite of his raw, bloody soy steak. Now he just had to wait.
Silently, he sat down and continued his session of violent hardcore...
online chess.


AM I DOING IT RIGHT?

Kett Shee

Sitting in his office downtown, Cait Sith was pondering the phone call he received from Blizzard. Something about the possibility of a job. Everybody knows that Cait hasn't had a good case in years, and his title as a private detective was becoming laughable....this might be just the job he needs...


Is this any good? ._.
You're all daft cunts. I love you. <3

WhiteRose

Rose knocked on the door of the detective's office. She knew something was wrong with Blizz; he had been acting strangely, even for him. She couldn't trust turning to the officials - she only wanted the truth, not to see him behind bars. Thus, she found herself in the offices of Cait Sith, private eye. If only she knew that Blizz had just recently phoned the very same man....

G_G

At home playing Call of Duty 4. I just so happen to look out my window early that morning and saw my pal sub chewing on a raw steak. Staring intensely at his computer screen. What is he up to? Oh well I'll just go back to my games. Dang, red ring of death. I'm gonna go pay sub a visit.

Blizzard

@element: Please don't use the attachment feature for any other purpose than Remexos.

LOL! BLOODY SOY STEAK!

I have arranged CS to take care of things. He said it'll take him 2-3 days until he has some information. I wonder if WhiteRose got wind of anything... I don't know how she would react or what she would do if she found out. I need to see my buddy G_G.

Later...

G_G isn't at home. That's weird. He's always playing Call of Duty 4 at this time of the day. I'll try to call him.

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Quote from: winkioI do not speak to bricks, either as individuals or in wall form.

Quote from: Barney StinsonWhen I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead. True story.

Kett Shee

August 17, 2010, 05:14:03 pm #15 Last Edit: August 17, 2010, 05:18:57 pm by Cait Sith
"Ah, WhiteRose, and to what do I owe this visit?" Cait Sith said as he gestured toward an empty chair. He was beginning to become slightly worried, perhaps she had found out about Blizz and the job he wanted him to do....
You're all daft cunts. I love you. <3

Blizzard

Something isn't right here... It looks like I have no choice but to call Sub. I wish I didn't have to. But she's my daughter after all.
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Quote from: winkioI do not speak to bricks, either as individuals or in wall form.

Quote from: Barney StinsonWhen I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead. True story.

G_G

I was on my way to sub's house. I got the eerie feeling that something bad was gonna happen like in those Silent Hill games right before a scary ass cut scene. Then out of nowhere. "Never gonna give you up! Never gonna let you down!". Scared the crap out of me realizing it was just Blizz calling me. I really gotta change his ring tone, rick astley's scarier then shit.

WhiteRose

Quote from: Cait Sith on August 17, 2010, 05:14:03 pm
"Ah, WhiteRose, and to what do I owe this visit?" Cait Sith said as he gestured toward an empty chair. He was beginning to become slightly worried, perhaps she had found out about Blizz and the job he wanted him to do....


Rose pulled up a chair, hesitant to say anything. Finally, though, she spoke. "It's Blizzard. I'm not sure why, but somehow, I have this feeling... that something isn't quite right. I don't have any evidence to support this, really, but he's seemed... strange... lately. I want you to keep an eye on him. I can pay well, of course."

Kett Shee

August 17, 2010, 05:56:47 pm #19 Last Edit: August 17, 2010, 08:36:51 pm by Cait Sith
"Hmm...I see. I will certainly take on this task for you. Do not worry though, I am sure a man such as Blizzard would have nothing to hide from his lovely wife. As for the price, do not worry about it for now, I will not charge you if I do not find anything out." He lied. Cait Sith knew everything already, He would throw Rose off of the trail of Blizzard, leaving Cait to do his work. In the meantime, Cait would have a visit to Delusion's Club to look for information about Blizz's lover. Cait Smiled a fake smile as Rose left seemingly in agreement with the lies he fed her, leaving him to the task at hand...
You're all daft cunts. I love you. <3

G_G

I answer the phone, still having that eerie feeling. "Wassup blizz? Just heading over to a friends house. My xbox got the red ring of death." There was no immediate answer. Again that creepy feeling is still there, but its getting worse. "Blizz?"

King Munkey

Munkey just went for his daily walk in the park, he finds it funny that still after the past two years of him walking everyone still looks at him funny. Sure he may be a genetically mutated monkey and human hybrid. But that doesn't give anyone the right to stare. He took his headphones off and walked towards Game_Guy's house. It was normaly for Munkey to go over to his house after his daily run and say hello. As he was walking over he noticed Sub staring at a computer screen and Game_Guy answering his phone, Munkey started to run over "Hey Game_Guy."

G_G Is my hero!
Munkey != monkey
Munkey > monkey

G_G

"Blizz?" I repeat. "Ah screw it. I'll call him later." I hear Munkey shout. Somehow my genetically mutated mother. But I never met the father. I start running towards Munkey, I imagine it in one of those cheesey romance movies where everything slows down and it plays that dramatic music. Then I fell into some sort of trap.

Kett Shee

Cait Sith couldn't let anyone know about his client's reason for hiring him. He snuck into the back of nightclub and into the dressing room of the Stripper that Blizz had picked up. He began rummaging through things, a makeup bag, a spare purse, nothing out of the ordinary. Until one thing caught his eye. There was a gym bag stuffed under a large vanity. Cait pulled it out and opened it up. Inside, were wigs and fake breasts. Cait came to the shocking realization that Blizzard's secret lover, was secretly...A MAN. "Blizz now has more things to worry about then his neighbors", Cait Sith thought to himself. Without thinking to clean anything up, Cait quickly got out of there, and headed for Blizzard's house.
You're all daft cunts. I love you. <3

G_G

Still having that eerie feeling 10 hours later I walk home after stuffing my face with burgers from Burger Town. I also ordered a new xbox with express delivery so I may just be able to play when I get home. Might as well call Blizz back. *Ring ring* *ring ring* "Your call has been forwarded to an auto voice messaging system. To leave a call back number press 5." Damn voicemail. Oh well."

Blizzard

"Damn... Sub isn't answering the phone." Then Blizz realized he got a voicemail. "Huh, a voice?" He realized that G_G has been calling and trying to reach him. "I'll call him back." Blizz went home and almost missed Cait Sith, he was just leaving. "Cait, give me a moment. I just need to call G_G." And so he called G_G who picked up the phone. "Hey, G_G, are you there? Sorry for the last call. Listen, I have problems. I need you to come to my place. There's things I need to discuss with you." Blizz hangs up. "Cait, let's go inside and wait for G_G. Then we will talk."
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Quote from: winkioI do not speak to bricks, either as individuals or in wall form.

Quote from: Barney StinsonWhen I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead. True story.

element

August 18, 2010, 03:02:59 am #26 Last Edit: August 18, 2010, 03:18:28 am by element
That was easy... Just got back from the club and when I got home, that girl was already gone. Wonder where she went... Ah, nevermind. Better get ready for work now. I work in the IT sector. Computers always were my stuff.

PS : Sorry Blizz  :uhm: wont do it again... and fixed the post  :)

Edit: Also, when this is finished we have to make a comic book about this cuz filming it wont be really possible...

G_G

Well I realized me and element are really the only ones using I .-. should we change to our names? if so I'm gonna do Ron.

After Ron talks with Blizz, he heads home, but he passes Gamestop and realizes he hasn't picked up the latest copy of Final Fantasy XXVI yet. Unfortunately Ron has no money. Maybe Blizz can borrow him some.

Note if you still want to call me G_G go ahead.

element

Ok I'll write it 2 as a he-perspective, though I like the I-perspective more  :P
PS : my name is Jeff irl

When Jeff was at work Ron came to him and asked him to borrow some money, he'd give it back at the end of the month. Ron is the other IT-er where Jeff works. He's always comes money too short. He's a game addict, but wich IT-er isn't? Jeff gave ron the money he needed. Jeff had enough money, he had rich parents. Though that had it's minor sides...

I really suck at writing in the He-perspective :p

G_G

I'm gonna keep the I perspective.

Jeff gave me some money. Hopefully Pokemon 15th gen doesn't come out soon so I can pay him back. Well I go to gamestop and get the new FF and the strategy guide. I go home to break the new game in. (Ron completely forgets to stop by Blizz's. He's more excited about the over cliche final fantasy game. Even though because of what he didn't do, something life changing is going to happen.)

Actually. I'll use both. If my sentences are in ( ) its in 3rd person.

Blizzard

It doesn't really matter what style you use. Use what you prefer and what you're comfortable with.
BTW, you were supposed to show up at my place, G_G! >8U (I'll keep calling you G_G, this is a CP soap opera after all.)
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Quote from: winkioI do not speak to bricks, either as individuals or in wall form.

Quote from: Barney StinsonWhen I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead. True story.

G_G

August 18, 2010, 10:57:13 am #31 Last Edit: August 18, 2010, 10:59:56 am by game_guy
I woke up after 8 hours of playing FF26. I remembered I had to go to Blizz's house. So I go over there all in a hurry. Odd still got that eerie feeling. Without knocking I enter Blizz's house only to see Blizz butt naked on the floor. Hmm, musta got drunk last night. I do what any person would do in a sitiuation like this. Grabs a jug of oj out of the fridge and poor it all over Blizz. Maybe I shouldn't use orange juice. Too much OJ can kill you. Zing. So I take stick from outside and jab him with it til he wakes up.

For people who don't get the OJ thing. I was referring to OJ Simpson. Man who killed someone and got away with it. Hence OJ can also mean orange juice. And if you don't get that too much OJ can kill you then go do something else >:U

Delusian

August 18, 2010, 11:20:19 am #32 Last Edit: August 18, 2010, 11:21:45 am by Delusian
WOW being a club owner is tiring. I turn the key making sure the entire thing is locked up. I know it'll be a few more hours and it'll be night, people ready to party again. I walk across the road to Blizz's house to ask him about the money he still owes me since he took one of my staff members away, having repeated sex with her, then discovering it was his daughter. I go to knock but the doors already open. I then witness Game_Guy poking a naked blizz. Kinky games I think...I stand rubbing my..... 'eyes'. And then leave in complete horror. Maybe I should tell the land lord. Get Blizz evicted.... or maybe something else is in order... black mail... I sit writing a letter asking for $5,000,000 to build a death star. I deliver the letter and sneak off with a evil laugh following.

ShadowPierce

->Guess I'll join in then be back again after 2-4 days... :P

I sit in the moving van thinking about my past life in RMRKansas, & wonder if moving here was a mistake. Even though I'm just about to move to this place, I already have a feeling that my life will be changed forever... As I try to shake off these thoughts & be a bit more optimistic, I fear that moving in here might have been the biggest mistake of my life. I've only been here for less than 5 minutes & haven't even left the moving van but I already witnessed strange things... Just past the comic book store, some guy wearing a Darth Vader helmet seems to be maniacally laughing, a few blocks & there's another strange man wearing a long, brown coat & matching hat who seems to be examining a fire hydrant. A few more blocks & I see much more horrifying things: a guy poking a naked guy with a stick & I think I saw a blond girl with no boobs wearing a mustache so thick you can get lost in it! As we stop by the place I'm moving in, I lower the gun I'm pointing at the driver whose pants that was blue an hour ago is now yellow-green-ish. I step off the van & embrace my new life here in CP...

PLOT TWIST?
I never really joined RMRK... :P


†

Spoiler: ShowHide
Quote from: Blizzard on February 16, 2011, 03:44:48 pmThere you go. It's the proof that SDK is crap. It's incompatible with itself.
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Blizzard

"Uhm... Shit, what happened? Oh great. Now I remember. I got wasted last night again and had sex with another stripper. G_G, can you go upstairs and get her out of here? And bring me some pants from my closet while you're at it." A couple of minutes later Blizz realizes something. "Where's Cait? We were waiting for you yesterday to show up and suddenly everything went dark. After I woke up I found a note by Cait saying that he had some other business to do. So I decided to go to the strip club. Hm... Now that I think of it, this is weird..." Another shocking revelation! "That's his cellphone over there..." Blizz goes and picks up the cellphone. "It's smashed... Damn... I think Cait's in danger. It looks like somebody kidnapped him. C'mon, G_G, we have to find him! I'll tell you on the way what happened." Blizz and G_G got into a van going to the hideout of a local gang while Blizz explains G_G what happened to him. "... and after seeing the test results, I couldn't believe what I saw. Sub is my daughter. I couldn't get myself to tell her yet. We had a fight, because I wanted to break up with her and she just left. Doctor Element was the one who did the test. I trust him."

Blizz didn't know that Element was actually working for Sub together with Delusian, the club owner. They were trying to make him believe he had sex with his own underaged daughter to blackmail him and get money from him. Delusian wasn't really in it for the money but to get the money back the Blizz owned him. Blizz and G_G soon arrived at the clubhouse. "G_G, you do the talking... I'm not really up for this because of last night. Let's find out if those guys know anything. If they won't talk, just start beating them up. I'll join and hand out blows to those guys until they start talking. I'm sure they know where Cait is."
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Quote from: winkioI do not speak to bricks, either as individuals or in wall form.

Quote from: Barney StinsonWhen I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead. True story.

King Munkey

Munkey was having his usual drink at Delusian's club, banana juice. He didn't really have much to do that day so he figured he would just hang around and hope something exciting was going to happen. After about 30 minutes of hanging around the club he noticed that Blizz and G_G walked in. He got excited and ran over to them wondering what they were up to that day.

G_G Is my hero!
Munkey != monkey
Munkey > monkey

G_G

I see Munkey running towards us. Dope. He tripped over his tail again. Silly monkey boy. Well to cover up what we were really doing I told him we were going monkey hunting in the Amazon. He was disgusted and walked away. Didn't want to do that but we're all in danger and we're running out of time.

Little does G_G know, Munkey was actually the kidnapper, and what G_G said, he will eventually regret it. Badly.

King Munkey

Munkey walked back to the table he previously was sitting at and took a drink of his banana juice. Taking his phone out he began to text Sub. "Your 'father' is here with G_G. I think they are onto us." He pressed the send button and started to play a game on his phone after that not paying attention to what Blizz and G_G was doing now.

G_G Is my hero!
Munkey != monkey
Munkey > monkey

Blizzard

"One of these guys here has to know something. Take your pick, G_G. Who's gonna be the first on our list. Or should I say fist?" It was clear that Blizz was pissed. The one thing that he hates more than somebody screwing him is somebody screwing an acquaintance of his. It's like Blizz didn't care to get the information by talking. He was already ready to kick some ass. "Hurry up, G_G. Cait could be in danger and every minute we spent wasting could mean one minute for him less to live. I am sure that he's found out something. Otherwise he wouldn't have been kidnapped."
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Quote from: winkioI do not speak to bricks, either as individuals or in wall form.

Quote from: Barney StinsonWhen I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead. True story.

Delusian

I sit laughing at Blizz, he wants to kick some ass. But little does he know. The $1.50 that some monkey boy had spent on a banna juice drink was actually a mind control potion. It took me a while but I finally stopped the earge to make him breakdance on his little tail, but to instead. Pole dance. It was the perfect distraction. And kindly helped his money stream as more and more people piled into the club. Blizzard and G_G were stuck in a crowd of people now whistling at the monkey pole dancer being mind controled by the magical and totally awesome club owner THAT IS *takes breath* Delusian!

element

Element was in a struggle with himself. Sure he couldn't resist to the money Sub promessed him... But was it really the best thing to do? Sub asked him to examinate 2 DNA samples and see if they compare. He never knew it was from blizzard just before the database mentionned it. From who the other sample was he never knew. Sure it was strange that his friend sub asked him to examine Blizz's DNA with Sub's. The next thing he did was tell blizzard. He was confused and told he knew sub and would tell her. "her"... Element found it strange that blizzard mentionned "her". Only afterwards when sub promessed him a lot of money he found out what sub was planning.

"Should I really go on with this? Blizzard trusts me... Maybe I should go to Blizz and tell him everything..."
Still in a struggle, element goes to the club cuz at this hour blizz is there most of the time.

Blizzard

August 18, 2010, 03:06:08 pm #41 Last Edit: August 18, 2010, 03:08:19 pm by Blizzard
Lol, it seems there's going to be a showdown at the club when G_G gets back. xD

Element arrived at the club, but Blizz hasn't noticed him yet. He's pretty much only focused on beating somebody up and waiting for G_G's ok to let the party start. "G_G, don't mind the crowd. As soon as fists start flying around, they'll make room for us."

Also, lol at shocking revelations every 3 posts. xD This is exactly what I had in mind with this soap opera. xD
Check out Daygames and our games:

King of Booze 2      King of Booze: Never Ever
Drinking Game for Android      Never have I ever for Android
Drinking Game for iOS      Never have I ever for iOS


Quote from: winkioI do not speak to bricks, either as individuals or in wall form.

Quote from: Barney StinsonWhen I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead. True story.

element

Depends... Maybe something has to happen there so we all have to go back home...
Don't wanna stop just now...  :D
When this is finished, can I make a RMXP-longcutscene thing from this? I need everyone's permission since u all wrote pieces of the story. I'll also need a picture of everyone xcept monkey then I'll make a sprite of all+a monkey  :haha:

G_G

"Lets punch the strippers. Zing." Blizz's rage got me worked up. I picked up a chair, and instead of throwing it at a stripper. I hit Delusian with it on accident. This isn't gonna turn out pretty.]/i]


Blizzard

"Jesus Christ, FINALLY!" Blizz pulls out a rubber chicken. "Time to start beating up random strangers!" But when you take a look at it, Blizz isn't beating random strangers. Each person he hits is actually either a gang member. Hell breaks lose and the fight extends over the whole club.
Check out Daygames and our games:

King of Booze 2      King of Booze: Never Ever
Drinking Game for Android      Never have I ever for Android
Drinking Game for iOS      Never have I ever for iOS


Quote from: winkioI do not speak to bricks, either as individuals or in wall form.

Quote from: Barney StinsonWhen I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead. True story.

G_G

Hehe somethings wrong with my mind. Before I knock a stripper out, I must grope their boobs first. I run to see if Delusians okay, then something fell out of his pocket. A ransom note. "If you ever want to see Cait again, bring 5,000,000 dollars to..." Its ripped in half. I have a feeling Delusian knows something. "Hey Blizz come over here quick."

element

August 18, 2010, 03:33:38 pm #46 Last Edit: August 18, 2010, 03:35:34 pm by element
Oops, Blizz and G_G... U posted before me :P I ment to post this :
I saw Delusion stepping at Blizz and G_G. He looked furious. What happend next was very confusing... Delusian, Blizzard and G_G got in a fight. I ran to them. Then I got in a dilemma. Wich one should I help? Blizz? Delusian? G_G? After a few seconds the fight got bigger, Blizz was punching wildly around him and hit a few others. Now more and more peaple got involved into the fight. After 2 minutes still thinking about the dilemma I had, I got hit with a bottle... Now I lie there, unconsious...

Modified version :
I saw Delusian, Blizzard and G_G get in a fight. I ran to them. Then I got in a dilemma. Wich one should I help? Blizz? Delusian? G_G? After a few seconds Delusian got knocked down. After a minute still thinking about the dilemma I had, I got hit with a bottle... Now I lie there, unconsious...

Blizzard

August 18, 2010, 03:46:02 pm #47 Last Edit: August 18, 2010, 03:47:15 pm by Blizzard
"What the hell...?! Delusian! What is this?!" Blizz grabs Delusian and pulls him up. Then he slaps him a few times. And then again with the rubber chicken. "What is this note?! What do you know?! Where is Cait?!"
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Quote from: winkioI do not speak to bricks, either as individuals or in wall form.

Quote from: Barney StinsonWhen I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead. True story.

Subsonic_Noise

Meanwhile, in his basement, Sub started to hear a sound so terrible that he was afraid his ears could explode. A bit later, after he finished eating a carrot, randomly beating everything around him and rolling around on the floor while shouting "I'M NOT LISTENING", Sub found out that the sound was in fact his cellphone ringing. Of course, whoever was calling probably gave up after the first hour, but now he saw that he got a text message from "NOT MY ALLY", which is what he renamed Munkey's contact to so he wont raise suspicion. The text message itself said "Your 'father' is here with G_G. I think they are onto us. Kisses and hugs, your secret lover."
Sub was furious. If they really were onto him, he had to act quick. He sran to his kitchen table and threw off his beloved stick figure made entirely from carrots, revealing a secret button, which, once pressed, made his microwave explode, revealing a secred swutch. Sub flicked said switch and the light in his kitchen switched on and off 3 times and his radio played a distorted "moo" exactly 36 times in a row.
Sub sighted, now he was secure after all. Relieved, he went to the fridge to get himself some sweetened tomato juice.

Kett Shee

Cait awoke in a dark room. He was dizzy, confused, and had no idea where he was. He was strapped to a chair, and in front of him sat a table with raw soy steaks and carrot stick figures on top of it. He could only assume they were instruments of some kind of sick torture. Then suddenly, he heard what sounded like a dying cow above him. Then the sounds of a fridge door opening...his heart began to pound. Someone was in the room above him...and could possibly come down at any minute...
You're all daft cunts. I love you. <3

Delusian

i noticed everyone writing in different tences first and second lol any who,

Blizz shook me asking repeatedly.
"What is this delusian??? I demand to know" I smiled and pulled a small device from my back poket and pressed a small button. the club statues that had once been still, where now all slowly walking towards G_G and Blizz singing the darth vader tune. Blizz instantly let go. I stood and watched as Blizz and G_G stood back to back ready for their final stand. One of the many statues lifted me up and flew into my half built death star above the city. Leaving blizz and G_G in danger...


*Cheesy guy appears on screen* WHAT WILL HAPPEN NEXT??? YOU DECIDE! Purchase our cereal and send use the card at the back to fill in what YOU want to happen. 1- Blizz and G_G get beat a most horrible death, 2- Blizz and G_G use a vodka bottle, strap it to a belt, throw it at the rubber chicken, which because of the law of mathminatasicology means the statues obviously melt (don't argue with mathminatasicology  :<_<:... it's a big word. If it has ology at the end... it's serious!) or 3- someone changes the channel of the world and makes everyone dance as if in an Akon music video!
Please enter now...

element

Meanwhile at the hospital...
Huhhh...  Whaa...   :???: Where Am I? Damn what happend? O no... Blizz, G_G, the club, delusian... I have to go there.
I tried to stand up and walk. I still was a bit dizzy. I tried to walk out the door of the room when a nurse stopped me. U must go back to your bed Dr.element... I can't! I have to help Blizz and G_G. She put me back into bed. Then after 5 minutes I thought of the most awesome escape plan... The only things I needed were a Bazooka, couple of extra guns, a bulletfree vest and a cola. Thingking of how to get these things I realized I worked at the hospital where I was and I could just walk out unseen if I had the clothes.
So I took some white clothes out of the closet and walked out of the hospital.
That was easy.
Now gotta go to Delusian's fast!

Spaceman McConaughey

Meanwhile, in a neighboring town, Branden was struggling to pay his mortgage...

"Fuck... it's due again, and no money. Urgh, time to suck it up, and do this.. again."

Branden then made his way down to the local bank, not happy about what he will have to do in the least bit.

"H-hello? I am here to... PAY my mortgage..."

As if out of nowhere, the owner of the bank pranced out, wrists all limp, with his noticeable lisp, and said...

"Hi there, big guy! I missed you so much! Are you ready to do this?"

"...Yeah, let's just get it over with. I need a roof over my head."

The bank owner then jumped up and down, with his hands covering his heart screaming...

"YAY! YAY! HOORAY! LET'S DO IT!!"

"O-okay... let's do it."

They then went into the back of the bank, and did things which most would call "horrifyingly disgusting, and unnatural".. because they were.

"Mmm... that was great! 'Kay, I'll pay your bill right now."

Branden then said, whilst sobbing...

"Thank you..."

He then made his way home, where he knew he had another month to keep his house, but still torn-up emotionally over this, and because he'll no doubt have to do it again. He cried himself to sleep that night.

wolfspirit

Elsewhere, wolfspirit woke up in alley with a bottle of vodka in his one hand while his other hand was holding the ass of a young woman.
"Oh, sh*t, I got wasted again." Wolfspirit took a gulp of the vodka, stared at the ass of the woman - who was still sleeping - and then threw away the bottle.
He scratched his hair, trying to remember what he did last night.
After a while, he gave up and walked back to the street.
As he looked up he saw a half built deathstar hovering in the sky.
"What the... Oh f#ck, I'm still waisted."
Wolfspirit stretched his arms and went back to sleep, leaning against the door of a random bar.

G_G

Pft. People thought I was crazy. Spending a years salary on a custom made Xbox 360 Controller with a built in jet pack and gattling guns. And they thought I was even more crazy for carrying it around everywhere I go. I type in the combo to activate it, swoop down and grab Blizz and Delusian and blast the shit out of those statues. I head towards my house. I guess I'm not so crazy now am I.

Blizzard

Blizz and Delusian regain consciousness after G_G's crazy rescue. "Argh... What happened...? Right... G_G, where's Delusian? Ah, there he is!" Blizz grabs Delusian and starts furiously shaking him. "You will now tell me where Cait is and what the hell is going on!" Blizz grabs G_G's super controller weapon and points it at Delusian's head. "You know what this thing is capable of. Don't make me have to use it."

Delusian, you have to talk now.
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Quote from: winkioI do not speak to bricks, either as individuals or in wall form.

Quote from: Barney StinsonWhen I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead. True story.

Delusian

I was being shaken...
"oh i left her at the club, just check the back room. she's busy playing farmville... don't get me started -_-" I tried to get her off the damn thing and into the celler but NOOO! She thinks her crops might die... damn farmville..."

Blizzard

"O_o; Alright... G_G, go get Cait. I'll keep watch over him. Call me if anything goes wrong and I'll make pasta of this guy. Delusian, you better not be lying."
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Quote from: winkioI do not speak to bricks, either as individuals or in wall form.

Quote from: Barney StinsonWhen I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead. True story.

G_G

Goes back to the bar and goes to the back room to find cait playing farmville. "Cait lets go. I'm rescuing you." Cait fights back. So I pull out my PS3 Controller tranquilizer and shoot him in the ass. He must have been under a mind control spell.

element

August 21, 2010, 03:06:08 pm #59 Last Edit: August 21, 2010, 03:15:16 pm by element
Finally I come to delusian's. I see g_g and cait sith walking out of the club. I ask G_G what was happening. He sais that he saved cait and now goes back to blizz. Ok I'll come with you.
We came to blizz, delusian was also there. Delusian said I had to save him, why'd i went to the other side of the force...
Blizz asks me: What does he say element? What does he mean?!?

Blizzard

"You know what? Forget it. Delusian, you better start talking. I'm at the end of my patience."
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Quote from: winkioI do not speak to bricks, either as individuals or in wall form.

Quote from: Barney StinsonWhen I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead. True story.

element

No! Blizz, whatever he sais, I didn't ment to ...

wolfspirit

Wolfspirit pops in with a bottle of beer in his hand.
He looks around and nods with a serious face
Then he climbs up a ladder and grabs on to the curtain.
"Hicks... I'll slave myou.. hick!!"
He jumps while holding on to the curtain and grabs a cucumber of the ground.
"Hicks... don'ts worry m'lady.. hick... yourf safe now.. hicks."

G_G

"Blizz, we have a problem. This isn't Cait. Its a clone. In fact a female addicted to farmville." Not knowing what to do or where the real Cait is. Its stressful. I hope things work out okay.

Blizzard

"God dammit! I can't believed it! START TALKING, DELUSIAN!" But Blizz didn't know that he was yet another puppet of Sub. And soon the puppet would have outlived its usefulness.
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Quote from: winkioI do not speak to bricks, either as individuals or in wall form.

Quote from: Barney StinsonWhen I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead. True story.

G_G

"Well Blizz, since we're basically stuck until we get answers, I have questions. What did you need to talk to me about that one night? And, why is Cait even important?" G_G basically got drug into all of this without knowing anything. He wished he would have remembered to go to Blizz's house that one night. Maybe things would have went better.

Blizzard

"I wanted to tell you what I found out..." Blizz explains to G_G that Sub is his daughter and that Cait was supposed to gather information on who knew about this. "... and ever since Cait was kidnapped, I knew that something wasn't right. Why would somebody bother to stop me from finding out who knew about my relationship with Sub and who knew about Sub being my daughter. It just doesn't add up. There must be something more to it. Maybe somebody is behind all of this. But why? And for what purpose?" G_G realizes that things must've been going pretty badly for Blizz lately and that he's got into trouble. Tough luck.
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Quote from: winkioI do not speak to bricks, either as individuals or in wall form.

Quote from: Barney StinsonWhen I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead. True story.

WhiteRose

Quote from: Blizzard on August 23, 2010, 03:03:01 pm
"I wanted to tell you what I found out..." Blizz explains to G_G that Sub is his daughter and that Cait was supposed to gather information on who knew about this. "... and ever since Cait was kidnapped, I knew that something wasn't right. Why would somebody bother to stop me from finding out who knew about my relationship with Sub and who knew about Sub being my daughter. It just doesn't add up. There must be something more to it. Maybe somebody is behind all of this. But why? And for what purpose?" G_G realizes that things must've been going pretty badly for Blizz lately and that he's got into trouble. Tough luck.



Rose chucked quietly to herself as she listened to the conversation through the minutely microscopic microphone masked in her man's metallic... (dang, I can't think of something Blizz would be wearing that starts with M. So much for my alliteration) collar button. He'd never find out how she was involved in all of this.... If he did, it would blow his mind.

G_G

Quote from: WhiteRose on August 23, 2010, 09:01:22 pm
Rose chucked quietly to herself as she listened to the conversation through the minutely microscopic microphone masked in her man's metallic... (dang, I can't think of something Blizz would be wearing that starts with M. So much for my alliteration) collar button. He'd never find out how she was involved in all of this.... If he did, he would shit bricks.


Fixed last sentence.

I am in awe. Though oddly, my rare disease Dance-and-Singophelia is acting up again. The disease makes me sing and dance randomly out of nowhere. "Just a small town girl! Livin in a lonely woorrld. Took the midnight train gooiin aneeewhere. Uhm...erm...Oh woops, left the radio on. He he...." Nobody knew about it until now.

Plox Twist :o

Kett Shee

Cait Sith chuckled loudly in his chair. He was beginning to lose his sanity. "HAHAHAHAHA, WHY DON'T YOU KILL ME ALREADY, HUH?! WHAT'S YOUR GAME!? I KNOW YOU CAN HEAR ME DAMN YOU, ANSWER ME!!!" Cait stared at the soy steaks and carrot stick people on the table in front of him, He still wondered what these things could mean, and what his fate is going to be.
You're all daft cunts. I love you. <3

Blizzard

"O_o; G_G, are you alright? Anyway... Delusian, I'm at the end of my patience." Blizz grabs Delusian's left hand and breaks his pinky. "From now on, every minute I will start breaking one of your fingers until you start talking. When I'm out of fingers, I'll start cutting them off. G_G, get me my wife's garden tools." Blizz had this mad grin on his face. One could see that he's had enough of it and that he would do anything to stop this madness even if it meant to get mad himself.
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Quote from: winkioI do not speak to bricks, either as individuals or in wall form.

Quote from: Barney StinsonWhen I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead. True story.

G_G

I head to his shed outside and grab any garden tool I can. Oh whats this. I found something really shiny. I pick it up and what do you know. "BLIZZ! GET OUT HERE QUICK!" It opened a door to some underground area. Not waiting for Blizz, I head down not knowing whats down there. I heard something groan, get scared and head back up and wait for Blizz.

Subsonic_Noise

Adding the last piece to the puzzle he just bought at the local walmart, Sub noticed screams from downstairs. Of course. He knew he forgot something. Putting away his carrot cake he just baked, Sub went down to the basement and inserted his Rick Astley CD into his CD Player and closed the isolated door.
He would get to his visitor when he finished watching his favourite documetary on old train tracks in southern germany. Chuckling, Sub continued eating his soy steak.

Kett Shee

Once the song "Never Gonna Give You Up" ended, Cait Sith sighed with relief. "I hope to god it's not on repe-" Sure enough, the song began to play again. "NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!"
You're all daft cunts. I love you. <3

Ryex

oh, oh THIS is gonna be good.

Five miles out of town Ryex raced along on his rice rocket approaching the city limits at 85 miles an hour. he had come in to town to visit his father, Blizzard. Blizz only technically his father through a strange and contorted set of events involving college parties, alcoholic, "clinical testing" (illegal cloning), and some technology "barrowed" from area 51 to quickly age said clone to slightly younger that Blizzard himself. Ryex had set an email two days before to let him know he was going to be in town today. but under the circumstances (unknown to Ryex) it would be no surprise if it had slipped his mind
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Blizzard

Oh yeah, it is. xD

Blizz grabs a knife and pierces it into Delusian's hand. Delusian's hand is now bleeding and has a knife stuck in it and he's freaking out. He loses all his cool and tells Blizz that the real Cait is being hold in a basement at a specific address. The address is unknown to Blizz and he doesn't realize that this is Sub's real home. Blizz knocks Delusian out and ties him up. Then he leaves his house to get Cait out of trouble.

Blizz arrives at the scene and breaks in the front door encountering some weird guy. Even though he never met that young man, Blizz has an uncanny feeling about him. Disregarding that feeling and treating Sub as a complete stranger Blizz starts yelling.

"Where is he?! Let Cait go and I'll forget that I ever saw you here. If you oppose me in any way, you will regret it."

Sub assumes that Blizz didn't recognize him.
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Quote from: winkioI do not speak to bricks, either as individuals or in wall form.

Quote from: Barney StinsonWhen I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead. True story.

Subsonic_Noise

Well now this nearly went wrong. Good thing he didn't recognise me.
In a hurry, Sub shouts a few random words at Blizzard to distract him and runs to the basement were he locks the door by putting his half finished sculpture of Nitzsche riding a gigantic duck made from solid steel in front of the door. Having forgotten to turn on the light, he follows Rick Astleys fabolous vocals and Caits pain-filled screams to the little room the farthest from the entrance. There, he stopps the CD player by continously hittinf his head against it and then activates a trap door by playing his favourite triangle exactly 149 times.
Putting on his cape and mask, he said: It's time. Then he jumped down and started running. 
Because he's the hero Gotham deserves, but not the one it needs right now. So we'll hunt him because he can take it. Because he's not our hero. He's a silent guardian, a watchful protector. A dark knight.

Blizzard

Quote from: Blizzard on August 17, 2010, 03:28:33 pm
Just, please, for the sake of pedobear, don't be stupid.
...
Again, please, for the sake of pedobear, don't be stupid.


So I'll just cut your entire plotline.



Blizz is at first confused about what's going until he sees Sub leaving. He investigates the house and finds the room where Cait is being held captive. He moves Nitzsche's solit steel statue the same way Sub got it in front of the door in the first place. He finds Cait and frees him. Cait is still in shock and can't believe that it's finally over. Blizz takes Cait back to his place. After arriving at home, Blizz lets Delusian free.

"Go fuck yourself, Delusian. This isn't over yet. You'll get what you deserve."

Cait explains the truth to Blizz. Blizz finds out about all of it. Sub is not his daughter, it was just a conspiracy to get on his secret gold mine. Sub was supposed to be confirmed as his daughter and then they would kill Blizz and let Sub inherit his gold mine.

"You mean..."

This seems really to be getting to Blizz. It was a huge conspiracy and many people were involved.

"I'VE ALMOST HAD SEX WITH A MAN?! OH MY GOD! MY EYES!"

But it's not over yet. Even though, now that Blizz knows their plans and they can't succeed anymore, they still have to be brought to justice. Blizz decides to take it into his own hands. But first he wants to talk to his wife, WhiteRose, about what happened.
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Quote from: winkioI do not speak to bricks, either as individuals or in wall form.

Quote from: Barney StinsonWhen I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead. True story.

Subsonic_Noise

I don't care because I had the best outro any superhero could have.

Blizzard

Thank you.

Quote from: Blizzard on August 17, 2010, 03:28:33 pm
Just, please, for the sake of pedobear, don't be stupid.

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Quote from: winkioI do not speak to bricks, either as individuals or in wall form.

Quote from: Barney StinsonWhen I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead. True story.

Subsonic_Noise

You fail to realize that the whole thread was indeed very stupid. kthxbye

Blizzard

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Quote from: winkioI do not speak to bricks, either as individuals or in wall form.

Quote from: Barney StinsonWhen I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead. True story.

WhiteRose

Stop fighting >.<

Rose was surprised to receive the message from Blizz; he wanted to talk with her, even after all of this? Reluctantly, she agreed to the terms of the note. She met him at the designated meeting place, ready to converse.

Kett Shee

Cait Sith sat in his office. It had been a few days after he had been released from therapy...but the things that Subsonic_Noise did to him could never be washed from his memory. He decided to switch over to his second job for a while. He got up, walked towards the door, and replaced the bronze plaque that was placed there before. It now read: "Cait Sith - Kitteh Attorney." He sat back down and sighed. "I wonder if I'll get any cases...."
You're all daft cunts. I love you. <3

Subsonic_Noise

Still running, Sub decided that he had to dissapear for some time. Still, he didn't want to leave the city...
Sub sighed. He had no choice, he had to take on his second identity again, the one he used to hide from
the only CP member he ever feared.. sub shuddered. Better not think o of it. He now had to lead the life of a normal person again.. time for the preparations.

Ryex

Ryex's bike hit 102 mph as it crossed the city limits, navigating the town's traffic at 102 was a challenge even though it was light. hitting the breaks Ryex slid over a hundred and fifty feet wiping around to face Blizz's house at the end. "YAH!" Ryex let out a triumphant roar, like that of an enraged lion, reveling in the thrill of the ride. parking the bike in the drive Ryex went up to knock on the door
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Blizzard

"Rosey... I know I've been weird in the last few days. You know that I usually trust you and tell you what's going on, but this was something I had to take care of myself." Blizz explains to WhiteRose what happened. At first she is angry that Blizz almost cheated on her, but then she is relieved to hear that nothing really happened and she actually sympathizes with Blizz when she finds out that Sub was a guy. "So... What are we gonna do about this?"
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Quote from: winkioI do not speak to bricks, either as individuals or in wall form.

Quote from: Barney StinsonWhen I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead. True story.

Ryex

Ryex's spiral designed white and blue collar shirt was unbuttoned on his chest revealing the solid black T underneath. this combined with the black denim jeans was his signature look giving him awesome powers of coolamness. *BAM**BAM*BAM* Ryex knocked on Blizz's front door completely ignoring the doorbell next to the door.
I no longer keep up with posts in the forum very well. If you have a question or comment, about my work, or in general I welcome PM's. if you make a post in one of my threads and I don't reply with in a day or two feel free to PM me and point it out to me.<br /><br />DropBox, the best free file syncing service there is.<br />

Subsonic_Noise

Meanwhile, at his home, Shiny Magikarp cooked himself a coffee. He knew the doctor said the caffeine wasn't good for his heart, but he couldn't help it - he always had his coffee at 5pm for at least 50 years now. Listening to the drops of coffee falling into the can, Shiny Magikarp put on his TV - there was a soap opera there he liked to watch, fittingly called "CP - The Soap Opera", which he had been following from the start, and the advertisement said todays episode would be the big showdown. It was apways a good way to relax from his work - he had worked at the local toothbrush factory for his whole life, as did his father and his grandfather, but he never grew tired of it - the factory was his life.
"Today must be my lucky day" he thought, as The coffee finished atthe exact same time the new episode started.
Shiny Magikarp sighted. He certainly was a completely normal human being.

Not the slightest bit insane.





Delusian

*I Spontaneously reappear leaving audience members shocked and terrified (futurama reference ;) ).*

I'm back, my gun is loaded, the cat is fed, and my club floor needs hoovering. But the fact remains... i'm hungry.

Taboo

After months of petitioning, raising funds, and gathering more fans, Luke had finally gotten his favorite show "CP- The Soap Opera" back on the air. He was ecstatic and hoped the show would continue soon.

The Niche

The show opens with Niche sitting on a brickwall. A little way down, a man is talking to the wall. Niche ignores him, smoking on his pipe from which purple smoke emanates.

"So you want to hear a story?" Niche says with a sly smile.

There is no response except the slow, steady murmur from below him.

"Well, I guess I have nothing better to do. Would you like to hear his story?" He says, gesturing to the man talking to the wall. The camera pans down, revealing the man is pleasuring himself, then the camera refocuses on Niche who has suddenly donned an Elvis costume.

"It starts a long, long time ago. Back when I was insane," More smoke emanates from the pipe, covering the screen. A scene begins to form in the smoke.

"Or maybe I'm insane now. Who can tell?"
Level me down, I'm trying to become the anti-blizz!
Quote from: winkio on June 15, 2011, 07:30:23 pm
Ah, excellent.  You liked my amusing sideshow, yes?  I'm just a simple fool, my wit entertains the wise, and my wisdom fools the fools.



I'm like the bible, widely hated and beautifully quotable.

Dropbox is this way, not any other way!

Power Hungry Midget

It has been years, since that vegan frankfurter guzzling german Sub had kidnapped me from my feline abode. Now I wait earnestly by the window every day. I see the small children he brings into the house with him. I jump from my perch and land like a cat. Wait, like a cat? Oh look a mouse. Back to my point, I must escape this prison but I do not wish to tarnish my perfect record. There's nothing worse then a feline felony. Oh I'm on fire today. I need a kitteh attorney. That's right I EINSTEIN SCHARGE need a kitteh attorney.

The plot thickens......

I have a mind to join a club and then beat you over the head with it.
     -Groucho Marx
I often quote myself. I find it adds spice to the conversation.
     -George Bernard Shaw

http://xkcd.com/303

Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same.
    -Oscar Wilde

The Niche

A cat walks into the office and sits on the table. I don't look up from my cleaning, assuming it's master Cait in his ...other form, but then the cat address me.

"You. Maid," I realise I'm still wearing my maid's clothing. Why do I have to wear this disguise?

"Yes?" I address the cat in a feminine voice. I'm talking to a cat. That's normal. Everyone talks to cats. Right?

"Where is the kitteh attorneh? WHERE IS HE?" the cat screeches. Now I'm being shouted at by a cat. That's normal too, isn't it?

"Master Cait is out. He hasn't been here in over a week. I believe he is working on a case for a master Taboo, who I must say is a most respectable individual and certainly not involved in any sort of disreputable business,"

"Silence, maid. Inform the kitteh attorneh that Einstein Scharge came in and that I will return in one day's time at exactly twelve seconds past twelve minutes past midday. He will be there, or he will be square,"

The cat struts out. I studiously ignore it as I go back to what I was doing beforehand. Which certainly doesn't involve searching Cait's private documents for the government.
Level me down, I'm trying to become the anti-blizz!
Quote from: winkio on June 15, 2011, 07:30:23 pm
Ah, excellent.  You liked my amusing sideshow, yes?  I'm just a simple fool, my wit entertains the wise, and my wisdom fools the fools.



I'm like the bible, widely hated and beautifully quotable.

Dropbox is this way, not any other way!

Taboo

"So, Cait Sith, you think you'll be able to defend me?" I ask in a low voice.
"I do believe so, but I must ask. Are these allegations true?" his voice a little shaky. Perhaps having my heavily armed and muscled guards standing right behind him wasn't the best way to communicate, but I have to keep my image.
"My good man, would you really refuse to take my case if I truly was a pirate?" I ask, raising my left eyebrow.
"No, I suppose I wouldn't," he said, looking down.
"Very good, Tyrone, Jamal, show him the way out," I say dismissing them with a wave of my hand and spinning around in my chair to look out from my penthouse suite over the city.

Power Hungry Midget

So that Kett Shee is unavailable at the moment. I am presented with quite the dilemma. I have no choice but to endure yet another musical collaboration with that crazed Aryan and his army of E. Coli mutated Cucumbers/tomatoes/lettuce/maybe beansprouts/ or broccoli, I've never trusted broccoli.

The plot thickens......

I have a mind to join a club and then beat you over the head with it.
     -Groucho Marx
I often quote myself. I find it adds spice to the conversation.
     -George Bernard Shaw

http://xkcd.com/303

Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same.
    -Oscar Wilde