Dealing with assholes

Started by The Niche, May 22, 2011, 05:49:57 am

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The Niche

Ok, we've all had to do it at some stage or other. In my case, now. I'd just like to know how you guys do it.

Personally, I'm trying a sort of condescending/patronizing approach along the lines of:

"[Stupid comment]"

"That's very nice. Why don't you go play over there?"
Level me down, I'm trying to become the anti-blizz!
Quote from: winkio on June 15, 2011, 07:30:23 pm
Ah, excellent.  You liked my amusing sideshow, yes?  I'm just a simple fool, my wit entertains the wise, and my wisdom fools the fools.



I'm like the bible, widely hated and beautifully quotable.

Dropbox is this way, not any other way!

Blizzard

I usually do it like that. Sometimes I like to alter my response. This would be a set a responses I sometimes use.

"Ah, I get it. You're one of those weird people." *turns away*
*facepalm, turns away*
"That was clever. Did you come up with that all by yourself or did you read it somewhere?"
*stares for 2-3 seconds, turns away and ignores*
"That's great, dude." *disinterested voice tone*
"Good for you." *disinterested voice tone*
*disapproving light shaking of head and turning away*
"Please don't start crying on me now." *turns away*
"Is that what your mom/girlfriend said to you?"

The main trick is to NOT use a condescending tone. The more you show that it is not triggering an emotional in you, the more impact your reply will do. You probably noticed that I use a lot of non-verbal cues.
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Quote from: winkioI do not speak to bricks, either as individuals or in wall form.

Quote from: Barney StinsonWhen I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead. True story.

Subsonic_Noise

What blizzard said, basically. Really depends on a person though. I lately used something along the lines of "Just learned a new word did you? That's cute. Did your mommy teach you?" since that guy was really insecure about being called a kid. It worked perfectly and spawned lots of lulz.

Blizzard

Yearh, it's good if you know their "weakpoint". They should be taught that messing with you has certain consequences (e.g. feeling like shit), this will make them avoid messing with you.
Check out Daygames and our games:

King of Booze 2      King of Booze: Never Ever
Drinking Game for Android      Never have I ever for Android
Drinking Game for iOS      Never have I ever for iOS


Quote from: winkioI do not speak to bricks, either as individuals or in wall form.

Quote from: Barney StinsonWhen I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead. True story.

Subsonic_Noise

Quote from: Blizzard on May 22, 2011, 08:30:05 am
Yearh, it's good if you know their "weakpoint". They should be taught that messing with you has certain consequences (e.g. feeling like shit), this will make them avoid messing with you.

That guy is afraid of me now. xD He did certain things I cannot forgive, and I tried to talk reasonably, but he just kept shouting and insulting me, so I attacked his weakpoints. Which he showed way too obviously. So, yes. If you know their weakpoints and they cross a certain border, don't be afraid to use that knowledge.

The Niche

And how would you go about finding said weakpoints?

@Sub: Are we talking about a certain, incredibly pleasant looking canine here?
Level me down, I'm trying to become the anti-blizz!
Quote from: winkio on June 15, 2011, 07:30:23 pm
Ah, excellent.  You liked my amusing sideshow, yes?  I'm just a simple fool, my wit entertains the wise, and my wisdom fools the fools.



I'm like the bible, widely hated and beautifully quotable.

Dropbox is this way, not any other way!

Blizzard

Observe their behavior. If they go around bullying people, it's likely that they are being mistreated in some way by their parents. You could just say out of the blue something like "Your parents don't love you."
Check out Daygames and our games:

King of Booze 2      King of Booze: Never Ever
Drinking Game for Android      Never have I ever for Android
Drinking Game for iOS      Never have I ever for iOS


Quote from: winkioI do not speak to bricks, either as individuals or in wall form.

Quote from: Barney StinsonWhen I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead. True story.

Subsonic_Noise

Quote from: The Niche on May 22, 2011, 01:18:31 pm
@Sub: Are we talking about a certain, incredibly pleasant looking canine here?

A certain caveman with suprising similarities to a monkey it is.

Spaceman McConaughey

I dealt with a friend who was an asshole over text messaging while I was trying to sleep:

QuoteFriend: Hey I heard u were gay nd had a wiiiiide ass

Me: Hey, I heard you had horrendous grammar and the brain of a mentally challenged puppy dieing on the side of the road.

Friend: Can I shove the dead puppy up ur ass nd watch it slowly suffocatw while u moan in pleasure

Me: And I also heard I am filing for sexual harassment. Good day, and see you in court.

Friend: Oooo sweet but ur still gay

Me: The more you harass me, the worse you make it on yourself.

Friend: Come on lighten up I'm jus lookin for a butt buddy

Me: Good for you and him. I should care why, exactly?

Friend: Cuz ik u get a ragin hard on for shemales

Me: Calling the police and giving them this number right now. Good night.

Friend: Duuude ur no fun its michael I jus gotta new phone

Me: It appears I have won. Nice fail, you gave up too soon.


See, I did not look for any weak points or anything, I just took advantage of the fact that he was sexually harassing me over text message, with his own number. And it worked wonders to have him lose at his own asshole game. But that was just my situation, so yeah.

The Niche

His fault for daring to challenge the mighty Branden.
Level me down, I'm trying to become the anti-blizz!
Quote from: winkio on June 15, 2011, 07:30:23 pm
Ah, excellent.  You liked my amusing sideshow, yes?  I'm just a simple fool, my wit entertains the wise, and my wisdom fools the fools.



I'm like the bible, widely hated and beautifully quotable.

Dropbox is this way, not any other way!

Spaceman McConaughey

Thank you, thank you. I know, I am that awesome.

But just remember, name's Rainbow Dash, mother fucker. >8U

:V:

Blizzard

Actually you did attack a weakpoint there. Nobody wants to go to jail for a stupid joke. xD
Check out Daygames and our games:

King of Booze 2      King of Booze: Never Ever
Drinking Game for Android      Never have I ever for Android
Drinking Game for iOS      Never have I ever for iOS


Quote from: winkioI do not speak to bricks, either as individuals or in wall form.

Quote from: Barney StinsonWhen I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead. True story.

Vell

Nor do they want to spend the lawyer fees it'd take to -not- go to jail.