Ugh. My girlfriends mom is just really irritating. I've got a kinda-ish long story and for those interested in reading, thank you.
Quote from: gameus on June 05, 2013, 06:22:07 pm
(On a side note, my girlfriend currently lives with me, theres a long story behind that, but yes, she's coming to live with me at my grandmas as well).
Like I said, there's a story to this and I feel the need to share it with someone. Yes we've only been dating for 6 months and yes she's already living with me, which in a lot of peoples eyes, is reckless and stupid because we're both young and we have no idea how long we'll even be with each other, and at this crucial point in our lives, if we don't end up with each other much longer, then it puts us both in a bind, because she has nowhere else to go. And due to the person I am, I would let her continue to live with my family and me until she found a place of her own or managed to find someone else to stay with. So yeah, it's a mess, and yeah it's a very touchy situation at the moment and we're both just kind of living it step by step until we reach the next phase of our lives and relationship.
So anyways, let me start. I met her back in the beginning of December. I met her at this school dance, now funny thing, she had already graduated from highschool and her cousin Ashley invited her to the dance. My friends Jeren and Anthony had both invited me, and funnily enough, I ended up asking my friend Madi to accompany me, I didn't want to go alone. If it weren't for Madi, I would have never have met Brittany. Madi is actually one of those girls who's pretty much a bro (a lot like Robin from How I Met Your Mother). Anyways, I'll skip most of the night and go on.... pretty much, I started talking to Brittany and after a week of knowing her, she got into a bad situation with her mom. Her mom is an alcoholic and one night she got in pretty bad shape and ended up hitting Brittany. Brittany already being 19 was sick of her mom and how she acted and moved out, her aunt gave her a place to stay for a few months while she saved up money and found a place of her own. Skipping even more, about three months, Brittany looked and looked and couldn't find a place she could afford. Unfortunately where we lived at the time, there were hardly any jobs above minimum wage, so one person can't afford to take care of themselves, especially with the cost of living there. She had no choice but to move back in with her mom. Her mom promised the basement for 150$ a month, and the basement was supposed to be like an apartment. Brittany was supposed to be allowed to do whatever, whenever, and bring anyone over. She was promised to be able to have room mates and even a pet, that all changed after Brittany had moved in.
At first, her mom was okay with Brittany doing whatever, but after a couple of weeks her mom started getting to a controlling point. Her mom would constantly text and call Brittany to see what she was doing and when she'd be home. And when Brittany decided not to go home that night, her mom would flip out and threaten to kick Brittany out. There'd be maybe two or three nights out of the week where she wasn't home, but why would it really matter? She's paying rent and shouldn't have to be home if she chooses not to. A) She's an adult and B) she's paying rent, yes she still has to abide by her mother's rules since she is technically the landlord, but it was getting to the point where Brittany had to be home at a certain time and she couldn't drive past a certain time. This led to many arguments. Brittany ended up getting hit by both her mom and step dad. During those nights the fights got bad, she'd come over to my house and stay over. And of course, her mom would bitch about that as well. And when these arguments happened, her mom usually got drunk beforehand and that's usually why the arguments started. Then her mom found out that we'd sleep in the same bed whenever she'd stay over, she didn't like that and she thought it was sinful and not the christian way. So she said we needed to get married before sleeping with each other or living with each other and straight up told her daughter she'd go to hell. Now here's where it starts to get bad. Her mom is now telling her entire family lies about me. I've personally have done nothing but be nice to her mom. For example on Valentines Day and Mothers Day, I got her mom flowers because her asshole step dad wouldn't. Instead, he would go out and spend a few hundred bucks on the new Wii U and some video games, yada yada. Anyways, she starts spreading all these lies that I'm controlling Brittany. Brittany stays at my place for a good four-five days because she didn't want to deal with her parents. Her mom assumes that I'm making her stay at my house and not giving her the freedom Brittany wants.
It got really bad one night, Brittany was bruised up bad on her arms and had a nice red mark on her face from being slapped. I didn't call the cops because Brittany asked me not to, she didn't want her parents to go to jail, her little sister wouldn't have anywhere to go. Since she wouldn't let me do that, I had no choice but to go and talk to my dad about letting Brittany stay with us. This was a few weeks before I graduated this year. I made a deal with him that by the end of the summer, both Brittany and I would be out of the house if he'd just give us time to save up money, in exchange, we'd help him out with groceries, taking care of my little brother, and getting everyone to and from school. Her mom got even worse. The drinking got to the point where she'd start bitching and complaining about every single person in her family. Spread lies about each one of them to another. THe family ignored her for a week and then she got even more mad and upset and started bitching at Brittany again, this time saying the family is ignoring her because Brittany decided to move in with a guy before marriage. Her mom tried saying she was shunned for her daughter not following the christian way. After about 2 months of Brittany not being there, her mom decided to try and break us up and she wanted the family to do it as well. So she started telling everyone that I beat her, that I got her pregnant and that I steal all of her money. She even came to my dad's house one day to "forcibly take Brittany out of the bad situation she was in." This didn't make my dad very happy and being the short tempered person he is, pulled his gun out and of course made threats. She eventually left when the landlord in our neighborhood came from down and threatened to call the cops, which would have put my dad in a lot of trouble, her mom most likely getting fined for trespassing or just taken off the property. In South Dakota making verbal threats is a punishable offense apparently.
Finally her mom starts to stop. She finally starts leaving us alone and letting us be, only having one of her outrages once a week, and they weren't bad. They were just her complaining about how everyone left her. Which no one left her, everyone still talks to her, but the way her mom sees this is that if the family isn't at her house everyday, then the family isn't there for her at all. Pure selfishness. So now we get to what happened today. I've about had it with her mom. We made a trip back to our town to visit friends and family yesterday and we stayed over night. Came back today. Today before we left, we went to say hi to her mom and her mom called the cops on me, of course we didn't know, she went into the other room, told them I was beating her, controlling her, all that other crap. Literally as we were leaving cops pull up. One of them holds me against my car while the others try to figure out what's going on. Needless to say, I was scared shitless. Thankfully they figured out that nothing was going on, Brittany looked fine and wasn't hurt nor pregnant for that matter. And now her moms getting fined for falsely making a report to the police. Regardless, the chance that I could have went to jail, I was scared. Her moms is trying her hardest to ruin our lives and the relationship between us and frankly I'm getting sick of it. I honestly have no idea what to do. Our solutions are to cut off contact with her mother, but Brittany won't do that, she doesn't want to lose contact with her little sister. Brittany also refuses to ignore her mom when she starts one of her outrages, they'll argue over the phone for hours, late at night, and it's just really frustrating. I'm telling her to ignore her mom. Most of her family is telling her the same thing. She won't listen to anyone.
But phew....it's finally good to share this. I was just so built up with anger because of today. Anyways, thanks to anyone who decides to read this. I know it's pretty long.