I'm Leaving - Permanently

Started by winkio, March 18, 2009, 12:09:46 am

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winkio

I'm leaving

This is a very hard decision for me, but it has come as a result of me thinking about my life and deciding to be more proactive about living my life.  I have to do this because deep down, it's what I truly want, and I know it's for the best.

To all members of Chaos Project:

I am leaving Chaos Project effective immediately for good.  My last day will be Saturday.  I could have a change of heart or whatever, but that is where it stands right now.
As such, I will take no more new involvement.  Over the next few days, I'll still be around tying up and closing down any involvement I have. 
Dissipate is not happening.  I am sorry to Aqua for making her do the few icons she did, and bugging her incessantly about them.  Nobody else really contributed.  For everyone else, it's mostly just a fan hype letdown, but you'll all get over it. 
Any workshop/studio that I have made will get it's topic deleted.  My scripts will stay up.
Blizz, I'm sorry but I don't even want to beta test your game anymore.  I'll delete it of course, but, yeah, sorry.

I will explain why I am leaving now:

First off, I am an engineer.  game design / computer science is simply a hobby.  I have realized that modeling and coming up with new things is a lot more stimulating and entertaining for me than working with RMXP all the time.  I'm at the point where I don't want to use it anymore.  I'm sick of helping people who don't deserve it and who have no concept of what they are doing.  Granted, not everyone  is like this, especially at this forum, but...  RMXP, the primary reason for staying on the forum, has deteriorated.

The secondary reason for me to hang around is the reason that SRK does: the community.  There is a truly awesome community at this forum with a great admin.  Nevertheless, I just don't seem to fit in here.  Never did in fact.  I always felt like the third wheel just tagging along on everyone else's heels.  I try and get involved, but it's obvious at this point that I am still an outsider.  I have no friends here, merely acquaintances with general people.  I can't really figure out why I hung around as long as I have.  So anyways, I apologize to anybody I was an ass to.  You are all great people and I hope you all have good lives.

-winkio



I'll be around for the next few days.  If any of you want anything I've made, just ask.


Landith

Aww... I will miss you winkio  :'(

I hope you have a change of heart and want to stay...

Valcos

Winkio, you get to be my 1000 post :'(. Imma miss you acquaintance. I dont use rmxp anymore either  :^_^': (shh)
"We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars."
-Oscar De La Hoya

Starrodkirby86

March 18, 2009, 12:22:17 am #3 Last Edit: March 18, 2009, 12:28:18 am by Starrodkirby86
Why are you an outsider?

Perhaps you haven't bonded with anyone as a true friend if you haven't made much contact to any person here. :P I mean, there's a whole other community out on the Instant Messaging world. I'm not saying you're antisocial there...but eh...oh well... Why? Why do you feel so "left out"? Geez louise man... You're already a valuable asset to the community. No, my point with that sentence was not we-love-you-just-because-you-make-scripts, since I know there's people who look beyond that...You contributed something here, you left something here, a legacy[blade ;x] I guess.

Please contemplate more of this. While it's true RPG Maker XP is primitive and is just a hobby, you can still see what interesting items can come off of it.

If you do leave, please come back...at least once in a while. You know, like give us a postcard or something! :V: Yeah, once you turn all extremely skilled and macho at whatever field you're going to (Engineering yes), show off your wares dude!

Fortunately you posted in the night where the least oh-inevitable drama will come...

Regardless, see you later bro. May our paths meet again. *finger salute*

EDIT: Oh and by the way, I felt deleting those topics would be such a waste of posts, time and effort...So I'm unstickying and locking that topic...If you think otherwise, please, please, let me know.

What's osu!? It's a rhythm game. Thought I should have a signature with a working rank. ;P It's now clickable!
Still Aqua's biggest fan (Or am I?).




Calintz


Reno-s--Joker

I would love to try and convince you to stay but I understand your position - moving on and being an outsider. Well... I'm glad it was a hard decision for you, lol. :haha:
.... Although I guess I'm just sad I didn't try and talk to and get to know you more. :(

Best of luck with the engineering - I'm not being sappy and/or polite here but I just know you'll do well. ;)

Sally


Tazero

YOU NVR GOT MY REQUEST DUN!!!

On that note bye, have a good life and.....be a 6ser


If you were a fish...

Blizzard

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! ;_;

Don't leave, winkio! ;_; It's not true that you aren't contributing or that you are an outsider. You are one of the most respected people here. Did you know that if you were more active I would have considered a mod position for you a long time ago? You are helpful, you are mature and you are patient. I completely agree with you being sick of helping people who don't deserve it and who, in fact, don't even take the bit of time to thank you. I have almost given up on that a long time ago. I only rarely post in a troubleshooting topic. The only thing that keeps me in RMXP is my game and Blizz-ABS.

I understand it you have enough of RM and I support your decision. There are points in our lives where we need to make choices and choose our paths. Looks like you've come across such a point, eh? Anyway, I hope that you change your mind about posting here from time to time just as a part of the community. You have contributed a lot in the RM area and in the community area and it would be really saddening to lose a valueable member such as you.

PLEASE STAY! ;_;
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Daygames
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Quote from: winkioI do not speak to bricks, either as individuals or in wall form.

Quote from: Barney StinsonWhen I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead. True story.

shdwlink1993

Normally, I would have quoted Blizzard's post and just have stopped, adding in a little thing saying how much I agree with Blizzard since, as usual, he managed to completely rip off my thoughts before I type them (preemptive plagiarism? :V:). But this is freaking WINKIO here. I'm not gonna settle for just quoting someone.

Even if you left RPG Maker behind, don't make that mean that you need to leave Chaos Project as a community. Again, many many people here do not use RPG Maker at all, and yet many of them are more active than those who do. I completely agree with Blizzard: You are one of the most respected members on this forum. Don't leave us just because of some people who don't deserve help getting it (Why do you think I respond to so few requests?)

And being an outsider? Granted, you do have a valid point. I have noticed several times that you aren't included as much as others. But then again, that happens to us all when we join a new community for some period of time. It varies from person to person. The only reason I come here as often as I do is because I don't feel like an outsider here, something that I typically deal with everywhere else in life. But I was feeling that just as you were getting included more, you starting posting a lot less. It's hard to include you when you post less.

Again, please reconsider. You don't have to use RPG Maker at all to be here. Look at Starrodkirby86. He contributes almost nothing, RM-wise (no offense, SRK. xD). He's also a very respected member and a Global Moderator. Diokatsu? Same story, minus the almost part of nothing, (a portion of) the respect thing, and being a Global Moderator. I personally like our community for, among other reasons, this reason: We don't all use RPG Maker. We aren't all interested in game making. We're more like a web of friends who help each other (and periodically poke fun at each other). If you don't believe me on that last point, then just read this topic (Except for reply 7, perhaps... xD). You've got a large number of people here who have posted in less than 12 hours. Blizzard almost sounds traumatized by the idea that you're considering leaving. SRK also thinks that you should reconsider the idea of leaving. Please follow our advice. Even if you drop RPG Maker, don't think that you need to leave us as well.

And if you insist, then I will miss you and good luck. But seriously: please reconsider. :'(
Stuff I've made:




"Never think you're perfect or else you'll stop improving yourself."

"Some people say the glass is half full... some half empty... I just wanna know who's been drinking my beer."

King Munkey

Yea I havent posted much with RMXP but I still hang around. I feel sorta like an outsider too I havent add much people to my IM yet but I was going to eventually. I just like the people here and that is why I come back just to see what everyone is up to. lol.

So yeah if you do choose to leave then see ya around, but you can always just hang around like me and countless others and post in the other areas.

G_G Is my hero!
Munkey != monkey
Munkey > monkey

Blizzard

winkio, I also noticed that you often were idling in IRC. Feel free to join the conversations (or senseless spamming xD) that are sometimes going on in there. Or feel free to crack up a different conversation. Don't be shy. :)
Check out our game brands:

Daygames
Game Night Games
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Quote from: winkioI do not speak to bricks, either as individuals or in wall form.

Quote from: Barney StinsonWhen I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead. True story.

Fantasist

Crap. I got logged out while I was typing the very long reply >.<

Please don't leave for good. You don't have to be active or contribute anything. Just drop in once in a while and say hi. I've made some really good friends here, whom I wish to actually meet someday. I always have a list of potential friends and you're on that list. You have my "more-than-usual" respect (among others like Blizz, Zeriab, WcW, Star, shdw, etc).

If you DO leave, know that you have my heart-felt wishes. Go out there and break some friggin' ground :)
Do you like ambient/electronic music? Then you should promote a talented artist! Help out here. (I'm serious. Just listen to his work at least!)


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Aqua

Winkio...  :'(

Don't be sorry for making me do those icons; I'm sorry that I didn't do them fast enough!!! T___T

I understand your reasoning for leaving RMXP, but why leave the forum?  We'll all miss you...  :'(

But... whatever you feel like doing, I wish you the best of luck with it.

I wish I could right more, but... this is short and to the point right?

Bye bye! *hug*

Tazero

Please don't leave, you
1) Completely rock my **** (Not in a naught way)
2) Your fun to talk too!
3) Your very quoteable?
4) You don't have a choice to disobey my ebilness please dun leave!


If you were a fish...

Punn

If someone should be crying about "not fitting in" or "Out of place", then that would be me, but I don't cry about it.
(Why do I still come to the forums anyways...)

Fantasist

Quote from: Punn on March 18, 2009, 02:35:10 pm
If someone should be crying about "not fitting in" or "Out of place", then that would be me, but I don't cry about it.
(Why do I still come to the forums anyways...)


Cause that's the point; you come here 'cause you belong here.It's instinct, don't deny it >8U

PS: nice sig!
Do you like ambient/electronic music? Then you should promote a talented artist! Help out here. (I'm serious. Just listen to his work at least!)


The best of freeware reviews: Gizmo's Freeware Reviews




Juan

Winkio don't leave this community because you feel like an outsider. You should post at least from time to time. We all have respect for you :). I really hope you reconsider and look over what everyone is saying. But if you do leave this community for good. It was nice knowing you. I hope you'll enjoy whatever is your doing.
Dropbox Who need luck when you can make your own.
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winkio

Thank you all for your posts.

I'm not blaming the fact that I am an outsider on anyone.  It's just that I don't fit in too well here.  It has no reflection on any of your being mean or excluding or anything.

About the whole people asking for help thing: that was a very small component.  it had practically no influence on my decision.  It just ended up on the same side as my decision.


And dammit, I'm sick of everybody, myself included, acting so weird on the internet.  I spent about an hour last night thinking about my situation and writing that post.  I teared up when I wrote it.  I teared up when I read your replies.  I love you guys, and I'll miss you.  So stop acting so damn polite.  Respect gets you nowhere without relationships and empathy.

Even though I didn't quite fit in, I recognize that I was a big part of this forum, and that it sucks that I'm leaving.  I hope you all finish your projects and have lots of fun.  I'll definitely come back and visit sometime in the future.


You have to realize that although this decision seems all of the sudden, it has been swirling around in my head for the past month. 
I'm definitely leaving, I've made my choice.

Calintz

You have a lot of good times ahead of you Winkio. Far better than now.
Keep that head up, and you're gonna accomplish a great deal of things in the future.

Good luck.

Diokatsu

I have to ask if maybe there'd be some way for you to stay. I mean, it would be nice to at least have you around. You've been a part of the community, whether you realize it or not. I'm also not gonna go all teary-eyed over you. Sorry, it's just something I'd like to avoid. I never really got to know you, but I at least had fun debating with you. It was nice for a while. But, maybe something did endear you to myself. You were someone who truly themselves. Those laughing stock internet facades that we all try and shelter ourselves behind at some point never manifested themselves in you. What I'm trying to say is that you weren't someone who I couldn't feel right talking with. Hell, you actually feel like a real person. It's not much to say, that you actually were real, but what is more, you weren't out to prove anything. Genuinely existing. That's admirable, winkio.

Like I said, it's not worth my time to cry over you leaving, but it's worth my time to at least give you my final sentiments before you go. You have no reason to think you never fit. I'm sure everyone will agree that you've been more than a member. Thanks for the time winkio and I hope you might find what you truly want, regardless of whether you stay or leave.

Shadonking

i didnt think your were an outsider.

anyway, good luck with engineering and we hope you will at least log on every now and then.









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Starrodkirby86

I'm not crying. Oh god, I'm not crying. Wait, what? Emotions can be such a thing, and I don't want to have them truly involved with my Internet experience. The fun ride has to be fun and only fun!  8)

Quote from: winkio on March 18, 2009, 05:17:30 pm
So stop acting so damn polite. 
Okay, you darn piece of useless scum. :V:

(And that's seriously sarcasm, serious sarcasm! Haha, oxymoron alert?)

I don't know what else to do here...Just keep saying good-bye with love and care? <3

What's osu!? It's a rhythm game. Thought I should have a signature with a working rank. ;P It's now clickable!
Still Aqua's biggest fan (Or am I?).




winkio

Star, you always struck me as the sarcastic type.  Fun, but lacking real emotions.

What I meant was that if you have anything to say to me, say it.  Don't just be all polite and say 'I hope you have fun'.  I'm the only one leaving, everyone else should still be here, so its not like you all should be bawling your eyes out.  Just a minor setback.


Aqua

But but but...

When I lose a friend, I /do/ bawl my eyes out... :'(
I'll miss you :(

Starrodkirby86

Quote from: winkio on March 18, 2009, 06:52:41 pm
Star, you always struck me as the sarcastic type.  Fun, but lacking real emotions.
Emotions...? What...are...these...emotions you speak of?

Oh crap, I'm following your description, no?

I developed this personality over time, at least on the Internet. No way I can back out of this grave now. :P You suggesting I'm inhuman or something because I don't have any real emotion? >:I I CAN ACT DRAMATIC TOO! ...Erm...

I'm an extrovert, face it. I'm dead inside with all that stuff, so happiness for me comes from the presence of others. :3 Or something like that...

Quote from: Aqua on March 18, 2009, 06:56:07 pm
But but but...

When I lose a friend, I /do/ bawl my eyes out... :'(
I'll miss you :(
I'm leaving tomorrow. Bye.

When I come back, this place will be like Atlantis. :P

(Of course that's a joke there)

What's osu!? It's a rhythm game. Thought I should have a signature with a working rank. ;P It's now clickable!
Still Aqua's biggest fan (Or am I?).




Punn

Wink, you and me and both, I'm far beyond an outcast in this forum, but meh.. gotta remember that their human (I think) and pretty much, they will go after you...

Might as well stay, and follow the rules of Appeasement...

legacyblade

Don't Leave winkio! You think you don't fit in? CP would feel weird without you, I think. But I understand, as we grow old, we abandon old hobbies. But I'm sad to see you go.

Blizzard

March 19, 2009, 03:33:06 am #28 Last Edit: March 19, 2009, 03:39:32 am by Blizzard
Quote from: winkio on March 18, 2009, 05:17:30 pm
And dammit, I'm sick of everybody, myself included, acting so weird on the internet.  I spent about an hour last night thinking about my situation and writing that post.  I teared up when I wrote it.  I teared up when I read your replies.  I love you guys, and I'll miss you.  So stop acting so damn polite.  Respect gets you nowhere without relationships and empathy.


I'm not being polite, I'm being honest. If that has to include something that are called emotions in this case, then so it shall be.
I'll miss you, too. :cry:

Quote from: winkio on March 18, 2009, 05:17:30 pm
You have to realize that although this decision seems all of the sudden, it has been swirling around in my head for the past month. 
I'm definitely leaving, I've made my choice.


I didn't think it was sudden. People don't make such choices rashly without reason and you had no reason to make it rashly.

Quote from: winkio on March 18, 2009, 05:17:30 pm
I'll definitely come back and visit sometime in the future.


I hope so. :) And I hope that you come back more often than you are planning right now. :)

Quote from: winkio on March 18, 2009, 06:52:41 pm
What I meant was that if you have anything to say to me, say it.  Don't just be all polite and say 'I hope you have fun'.  I'm the only one leaving, everyone else should still be here, so its not like you all should be bawling your eyes out.  Just a minor setback.


Define "minor". If somebody removed one of my kidneys, that's a "minor" loss, don't you think? You're a vital part of the forum whether you like it or not. I understand you feeling weird about being an outsider, but that's just the internet. Sometimes I don't feel as if I belonged here myself. But I ignore those feeling as I know that they don't reflect the reality. "I'm a 22 year old chatting with 13-15 year olds." See my point? But I realized that just because I'm the oldest (or one of the much older people here), it doesn't mean I can't connect to the kids.
Check out our game brands:

Daygames
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Quote from: winkioI do not speak to bricks, either as individuals or in wall form.

Quote from: Barney StinsonWhen I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead. True story.

Shadonking

even i feel like an outsider here becuase i havent been here as long as some of the others and also the difference of ages and personalities but i still like it here and there might be a time when i start to feel i fit in. also if you go then there is one less sane person here.





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wolfi--

Well, I can't say I'll miss you, I don't know many people here but I hope this improves your life.


Best of luck ^_^


winkio

Just so that you all don't think I've gone off the deep end with drama...

Quoteif you have anything to say to me, say it.


That was not an invitation for drama or emotions, but for honesty.  Damn.  Wasn't referring to everyone either.

QuoteI'm the only one leaving, everyone else should still be here, so its not like you all should be bawling your eyes out.  Just a minor setback.


QuoteIf somebody removed one of my kidneys, that's a "minor" loss

for you.  For me, someone removed everything except one of my kidneys.  hence my attitude.

I apologize to all of you for saying stupid stuff and accidentally starting all this 'drama' in this thread.  All I really wanted was an honest goodbye. 

Diokatsu

Quote from: winkio on March 18, 2009, 05:17:30 pm
I spent about an hour last night thinking about my situation and writing that post.  I teared up when I wrote it.  I teared up when I read your replies.  I love you guys, and I'll miss you.

I think that counts as drama... XD

fugibo

Seeya wink. Have fun when you move on to the real world, and best luck with engineering ;)

Calintz

Again, you take care of yourself Winkio!!

Tazero

Check in now and again!
Just fill us in. Like 1 every 3-4 months isn't so bad. :P
Best of Luck see ya.


If you were a fish...

Chaze007

Not much I can say, I loved your music Winkio I really liked the winter theme. I'll miss your works and company ]:
Always I Wanna Be With You! Make Believe With You!

Ryex

Dam why am I always the last one to the party.. or in this case the Good bye thread... any way I'm going to try and stop saying stupid things now.

*NOTE: the following is honesty!*

Winkio, while I'm probably one of the most anti social people here, ( I sit back and watch as others interact, and then.. sometimes jump in and make things strange/weird/whatever_else or... ya... anyway...) I just wanted you to know that I wish you the best no mater what path of life you take, and that you will leave a hole when you leave... goodbye and have fun.
I no longer keep up with posts in the forum very well. If you have a question or comment, about my work, or in general I welcome PM's. if you make a post in one of my threads and I don't reply with in a day or two feel free to PM me and point it out to me.<br /><br />DropBox, the best free file syncing service there is.<br />

winkio

Thanks everyone.  Now, I think I closed up everything and posted everything that's needed: my request things and my projects.  So, I'll just float around until Saturday.

Fantasist

QuoteRespect gets you nowhere without relationships and empathy.

I know what you mean. After all, this is the internet and life comes first. As much as we are a good community here, we are only as close as we can get on the internet, which is, most of the time, nowhere near personal life.
But as I said, I was inspired by some people here. I was in doubt what field I should take for my bachelor's degree. Blizzard and Zeriab inspired me whether they know it or not. I don't know if it was right to make decisions in my life depending on just what is supposed to be recreation. Imagine how my parents would react that I'm making an important decision b/c of some online acquaintances. Either way, I chose computer science and I'm enjoying it. Being a part of CP affected my life beyond the internet. For that, I'm thankful and I'd never leave here unless I really have to.

QuoteSo, I'll just float around until Saturday.

That's tomorrow. So one last time; see you around wink :hi:
Do you like ambient/electronic music? Then you should promote a talented artist! Help out here. (I'm serious. Just listen to his work at least!)


The best of freeware reviews: Gizmo's Freeware Reviews




Blizzard

Quote from: winkio on March 19, 2009, 04:41:47 pm
Just so that you all don't think I've gone off the deep end with drama...

Quoteif you have anything to say to me, say it.


That was not an invitation for drama or emotions, but for honesty.  Damn.  Wasn't referring to everyone either.

QuoteI'm the only one leaving, everyone else should still be here, so its not like you all should be bawling your eyes out.  Just a minor setback.


QuoteIf somebody removed one of my kidneys, that's a "minor" loss

for you.  For me, someone removed everything except one of my kidneys.  hence my attitude.

I apologize to all of you for saying stupid stuff and accidentally starting all this 'drama' in this thread.  All I really wanted was an honest goodbye. 



Don't apologize, there's nothing you need to apologize for. :)
Check out our game brands:

Daygames
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Quote from: winkioI do not speak to bricks, either as individuals or in wall form.

Quote from: Barney StinsonWhen I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead. True story.

winkio


Blizzard

Check out our game brands:

Daygames
Game Night Games
Chugnar Games

Quote from: winkioI do not speak to bricks, either as individuals or in wall form.

Quote from: Barney StinsonWhen I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead. True story.

Shadonking






Creator Of Music And Games
Spoiler: ShowHide
]

keywords: ShowHide
rmxp rmvx blizz-abs rpg maker xp vx abs cbs cms script tons of addons charsets autotiles HUD


come here if you have a ps3
http://forum.chaos-project.com/index.php?topic=1952.0

Landith

Bye Winkio! You were great to have here and I'll miss you! :(

Hellfire Dragon

This topic is 3 days old and I'm only seeing it now :O.o: I should look at this board more often :P Anyway, bye winkio :(

RoseSkye

FUUUUUUUUUUUUUU- I just had a question about his HUD.

Damnit. *looks around and smiles evilly at Blizz*